DOES SUPPORTING BARCELONA MAKE YOU ANTI-NATIONAL? ?

08.30 AM, 7th March, New Kenilworth, Kolkata.

GD/WAT topic: Every problem comes with gifts in its hands. Pretty straightforward. Wrote a page (that’s all you get) and GD was peaceful (unlike MDI) and everyone carried on the predecessor’s point.

PI: Two men. M1 and M2. Both male, mid 40s.Panel 1.

Prologue: Just before entering for GD/WAT, I wished M2, “Good Morning”. He smiled probably thinking, “I know what you are trying to do.” I was first in my panel. (Again)

M2: Akshay, Does that suit belong to you? Isn’t the blazer a little short?

Me: Sir, I had my first interview on 3rd Feb, had to buy straight out of the store. No time to get it stitched.

M2: What’s your height?

Me: 6′ 2.5″

M2: Nice. So why are you here?

Me: (Wondering what to say, I realized it’s just a Why MBA question) Told the prepped answer.

M2: (Smiling) Heard it several times. Chuck it. Which club do you follow?

Me: FC Barcelona, Sir.

M2: What is the history of political rivalry between FCB and Real Madrid?

Me: Told about Francesco Franco, atrocities in Catalonia, Nou Camp Bombings, Catalan population being pro-democracy and how people found it easier to support a club to show their protest against Real Madrid which was always considered King’s club.

M2: What do people of Catalonia and Basque want? (Yeah, now I was really sure he was a football fan too)

Me: They have cultural differences with the rest of Spain as they have different language and a different preference in politics.

M2: So Real Madrid kind of represented pro-Fascist faction while Barcelona represented democracy, right?

Me: Yes sir, at that time they did. It’s not that heated up anymore.

M2: So if a Football club were to open in Kashmir and another one in the rest of the country, which one will you follow??(Smiling)

Me: (Realizing where he was leading me, smiled back) if neither is in UP, and have equivalent players, I will support the one with better philosophy.

M2: Akshay, don’t be diplomatic. Which one?

Me: Sir how can I say, before watching them play.

M2: You support Barcelona and their ideology, right?

Me: Yes sir. I support their footballing philosophy. Barcelona is pinnacle of Tiki Taka while Real Madrid is pinnacle of quick and sharp counter attacks. I started supporting because of Ronaldinho.

M2: But he left.

Me: Messi is there.

M2: He will leave too.

Me: Then there will be Neymar.

M2: he will leave too someday. Will you stop supporting then?(smiled)

Me: No I will not.

M2: Exactly. Coming to original question, Kashmir or the other one? Me: Still can’t tell without seeing them play.

M2: What if Messi played in Kashmir club?

Me: Then, yes sir.

M2: Wouldn’t that make you an anti-national? Me: (Thinking s@#t just got real) No sir, I don’t think so.

M2: What is an anti-National?

Me: (Disclaimer first) According to me, Anyone whose interests hurts country’s interests directly or indirectly.

M2: Is Vijay Mallaya an anti-national?

Me: (Realizing I have to stick with my definition) Not outright but slightly yes.

M2: Why not? He defrauded banks, wants to run from the country. Me: He should be given fair chance to explain and repay.

M2: Then why didn’t Afzal guru get a chance?

Me: It was an attack on parliament and Union of India which is Treason while former is merely Bank Fraud.

M2: So hang Afzal Guru but give Mallya a chance? Many people call Afzal Guru a martyr.

Me: He was not a martyr. 50% he was innocent, 50% he was guilty. If innocent, he was a victim else if guilty, he was a terrorist. I don’t see why he is a martyr.

M2: (Smiling) So, why not hang Mallya?

Me: He has also done so much for country, gave jobs to so many people. Nobody died. He should get it.

M2: 3 suicides happened taking his name on the note. Abetting a suicide is a crime, yes?

Me: Yes it is but needs to be proven comprehensively.

M2: if someone goes out and kills 50 dalits, is he an anti-national? (He smiled. Was really enjoying this)

Me: He should be given Capital Punishment for this crime but he is not an anti-national. He might be a Xenophobe or having countless other phobias that people have.

M2: 485 mercy pleas have been rejected by the president most of them are Muslims and Dalits. What does that tell you?

Me: I don’t consider myself an expert in Mining Engineering let alone Judicial system. If Mr. President thinks it’s correct, I think so too.

M2: You are again being diplomatic. I am not going to report you. What does it tell?

Me: I don’t know sir. Maybe our system has loopholes that can be used.

M2: So you agree, our judiciary system is bad?

Me: No sir. It’s the shortcoming of the underlying principle. “Innocent unless proven guilty beyond reasonable doubt”. For someone rich and powerful, it’s easy to create reasonable doubt. Even in US if jury doesn’t find you unanimously guilty, you are acquitted and walk free. (Thanks to Suits)

M2: (To M1) I am done, he is all yours. M1: What do you do?

Me: Told the job and title.

M1: What do you do?

Me: (Kicking myself) Told the job description.

M1: Mention one change that you brought in safety at your workplace?

Me: (Finally) Told.

M2 Interjects.

M2: Tell me about your family. Me: told about Mom, brother and my Father’s death. M2: What calls have you got?

Me: All except ABC, MDI, SP, NITIE etc.

M2: What’s you preference order? L then K?

Me: No sir L=K. Perhaps I will choose K over L because don’t feel so good in Up after Dad’s death.

M2: Why are you blaming the state?

Me: I am not blaming the state. Just that it haunts me having spent so much time there with Dad. I think I will be more efficient at K.

M2: Ask your mother. She will disagree. Okay Akshay, last one, and this is tough one. If US invades Iraq, should people of US be blamed for the death and destruction?

Me: Sir indirectly, Yes as they elected that regime. Directly no, as they had no part in decision making.

M2: Any question for us?

Me: Sir, for foreign exchange, college considers only IIM acads or all the acads?

M2: You came to Kozhikode, and ask me the same question again. It was nice meeting you.

Me: Thank you sir. Have a good day sirs. Sorry for the long post. 22-25 minutes it took. Tried to handle it as good as I can. Kept smiling and replying the best I could.