It was 2'o clock at night, like every other night there was deafening silence everywhere. Everyone was asleep okay not exactly my grandmother was awake. Truth be told, she is awake 24x7. She is a humanized version of a day and night owl (if that exists). We always trusted our grandmother's instincts and Intel. Then she heard something, she woke my grandfather up and told him that there is someone on the roof. He got up reluctantly and put on his hearing aid. Any other day, they would not pay heed to it but just 3 days before that day, there was a robbery in our neighbor “RAMESH JIJAJI'S house. Everything seemed possible at that time. My grandfather is not exactly a fearless person in fact the exact opposite and he even takes after A.K HANGAL so he had every reason to wake my father, uncle, mother, aunt, elder sister and even my 10 year old cousin up. He didn't want to leave any man behind so that's how he strengthened his so called “special security force”(SSF). We were hit by a storm of chaos. We started looking for weapons ranging from cricket bats, wipers, toy swords, Laughing Buddha statue to vintage Nokia phones. We were prepared to take down any enemy be it china or Pakistan with such heavy artillery and ammunition. Our hearts were thumping, adrenalin was rushing, fear was palpable everywhere. We slowly started moving towards our destination, we reached the Ist floor felt as we had reached the middle of Everest. One more floor to climb and someone or may be more than one were awaiting us. Somehow we were there at the terrace door. We were contemplating who would do the honors of opening the wooden to be precise, Rosewood wooden door. Nobody was ready to take the initiative, my elder sister showed the needed courage and desire to do it. I was wondering if goddess DURGA had entered her body to exterminate our evil thieves. My elder sister aka “commander of SSF” opened the door hoping for an ambush or perhaps land mines. We screamed our lungs out while moving ahead to attack. Believe me you, what we saw was “phantasmagorical”. No, I am just joking. We saw nothing initially, we kept going ahead to spot someone or something and there we saw our “Culprit”. It was a cat (cute white colored kitten). We cleared the area, we occupied our territory back from the hostiles. We did not even lose the trust in the source of our Intel i.e. grandmother because there was someone on the roof.
Having done with my Bhopal trip, i booked my return ticket in chhattisgarh express for the 3rd of this month.. With a pdf of the actual ticket and the text msg of the same from irctc, i boarded the train..I reached for my seat at B3 08 Side Upper.. But there stood a man there, claiming it to be his. I asserted, its mine. He then took out a random piece of paper scribbled with some illegible handwriting and then with a greater confidence repeated the claim. Taken aback by his authoritative claim based on a random piece of paper, i took out my 5 inch smart phone in full panache and showed him my ticket. I also showed him the text msg.
All fine all good till here. I get myself comfortable seated. He went back and came with 3 of his companions holding a bunch of printed tickets. Out of them he showed one, which looked exactly the replica of my ticket with just the name changed. The date, 3rd.. The train, chattisgarh express.. B3 08 SU.. All same! How is it possible! There is something fishy.Then in a little casual way, we agreed that let the TT decide. I passed a sheepish smile and in my head thought, this man must have printed a photoshopped version of the ticket, damn him..
After some time, the TT arrives. I showed him both versions of my ticket, same did the other man. It somehow surprised the TT too. I suddenly felt, oh wow it could be once in a lifetime experience to have had a chance of a finding a loophole in the Indian Railway Booking system! The TT went for his spectacles and took his seat. He checked a booking list that these guys have. It is like the bible, it has the truth in it.
With an anticipated triumph over the B3 08 SU, i faced a big blow, when the TT read out the name of Ghaneshwar Bagde!Like What? Dude i paid 1000 bucks and i am not a Ghaneshwar Bagde! Is this a joke or what?Then he took a closer look at my ticket which now read everything exactly the same, the train no., train name, my name, my seat everything same, just the date instead of being 03/03/14 it was 03/04/14.April...! Yes.. Anubrato the great booked a ticket on a date which was a month away.. April...! Congrats Mr. Mukherjee, you just celebrated April's Fool in advance.
So now i was in the outskirts of Bhopal, and technically i was a person travelling 'without ticket' on Indian Railways in AC 3 tier, which meant i had the option of either paying the full fare of a AC 3 from the start station to the end one, or get down at the next station. The TT looked at me as if he was mr bacchan in kbc, and kind of asked 'To bataye, kaunsa option lock kiya jaye'.I asked for a lifeline, which in my case was, getting some time to think.Then thankfully another option struck my head. The option widely used in India. When you want to get a job done and left with no option, Bribe..!
I reached for my wallet and found a neat single 500 rupee note. 500...! A confirmed sleeper ticket must have cost more than that, and i wished to bribe that amount to the TT for a AC 3 berth. Impossible. Option dropped.With no money of course there wasnt any chance to pay a fine and that was also not something that i was looking forward too as the probable figure must have been close to 2000..With a backpack ready i was prepared to get down to the next station, late at night, and whose name too i didn't know.
Then came a eureka moment.Suppose if somehow i own a general ticket, which would entitle me to atleast travel in that train, i wouldn't be asked to get down. The AC attendant who was passively watching the whole thing asked me what the problem was about. I told him and also told the idea of getting out of this fiasco with the general ticket option. But how would i get the ticket from the next station i had no idea about?The attendant offered to get me the ticket through his sources, and in return i had to take care of his 'chai paani' which meant i had to pay double the amount of the ticket.
Thankfully even after doubling that amount it was under Rs500 and in another 30 mins i was having the ticket. Luckily in some more time i somehow managed to make things right and after talking to another TT i even travelled back home in a AC 3 berth itself. But during this whole situation i was least tensed and just enjoyed the moment. This was the biggest troll of my life and it kept me smiling for the entire journey. I learnt the lesson of being extra careful with the dates and i learnt it the hard way. But this whole episode of Bhopal tragedy of comedies, will sure bring a smile whenever i think about it.. :)
It was 2'o clock at night, like every other night there was deafening silence everywhere. Everyone was asleep okay not exactly my grandmother was awake. Truth be told, she is awake 24x7. She is a humanized version of a day and night owl (if that exists). We always trusted our grandmother's instincts and Intel. Then she heard something, she woke my grandfather up and told him that there is someone on the roof. He got up reluctantly and put on his hearing aid. Any other day, they would not pay heed to it but just 3 days before that day, there was a robbery in our neighbor “RAMESH JIJAJI'S house. Everything seemed possible at that time. My grandfather is not exactly a fearless person in fact the exact opposite and he even takes after A.K HANGAL so he had every reason to wake my father, uncle, mother, aunt, elder sister and even my 10 year old cousin up. He didn't want to leave any man behind so that's how he strengthened his so called “special security force”(SSF). We were hit by a storm of chaos. We started looking for weapons ranging from cricket bats, wipers, toy swords, Laughing Buddha statue to vintage Nokia phones. We were prepared to take down any enemy be it china or Pakistan with such heavy artillery and ammunition. Our hearts were thumping, adrenalin was rushing, fear was palpable everywhere. We slowly started moving towards our destination, we reached the Ist floor felt as we had reached the middle of Everest. One more floor to climb and someone or may be more than one were awaiting us. Somehow we were there at the terrace door. We were contemplating who would do the honors of opening the wooden to be precise, Rosewood wooden door. Nobody was ready to take the initiative, my elder sister showed the needed courage and desire to do it. I was wondering if goddess DURGA had entered her body to exterminate our evil thieves. My elder sister aka “commander of SSF” opened the door hoping for an ambush or perhaps land mines. We screamed our lungs out while moving ahead to attack. Believe me you, what we saw was “phantasmagorical”. No, I am just joking. We saw nothing initially, we kept going ahead to spot someone or something and there we saw our “Culprit”. It was a cat (cute white colored kitten). We cleared the area, we occupied our territory back from the hostiles. We did not even lose the trust in the source of our Intel i.e. grandmother because there was someone on the roof.
They say 'Idols' are worshiped and adulated by a young lot to look up to them,get inspired and follow their path.Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar has not been only an Idol to me since my childhood but also a constant example of an exemplary player,an ardent and a disciplined professional and a wonderful human-being--on and off the field. Because of this impeccable skills-set, no wonder, his fans across the globe are in awe for him and are transfixed by his very presence.For me, he's not retiring from the game of cricket, but in fact his in-depth knowledge about the game will be helpful in the fruition of Indian cricket in the future.The fantastic four of the Indian cricket team--VVS Laxman, Saurav Ganguly, Rahul Dravid and now Sachin Tendulkar, we gonna miss all you guys..!The very thought of not watching Sachin playing for India saddens his one billion crazy fans including me.Sachin--we love you, we follow you, we idolize you, we criticize you at times but you have always stood like a 'pillar' during your good and bad times and that's why none can replace you...#Sachin#GodofCricket#MissSachin
Date: Some date in Sept 2013 Location:Office(Second Shift) Time:6:30PM(remember it coz it's the free snacks time)
Me sitting at my desk and frantically trying to solve a 15 min mock DI test I have decided to take.One guy who sits near my cubicle comes up and askes,"Hey you preparing for CAT??"I'm thinking,"Damn,There goes my DI score down the drain".Still I keep my cool and answer."Yes I am. Going for snacks??".He totally ingnoes my question and starts telling me,even he once decided to do MBA but couldn't get the time.He is now having 7+ years experience in IT.And there all I could think was my test timer smiling at me saying.."Well done Nikhil..keep wasting your time and you'll do well in CAT".And then I realise this guy has stopped talking and I'm giving him a blank smile for no reason!!
Damage Control Time:I reply "Yeah its pretty tough,you need lot of time to prepare and concentration. and blah blah"He goes on to ask me which colleges I'm aiming.I say pretty much any of the IIM's. The very next question he asks me is do you any reservation?? I reply No.I don't for which he says,"Hmm..then its gonna be tough". Then I see on my screen the timer has stopped and is showing a message 'Time Up Click here for your score'.And then something happened for which I'm writing this article.This colleague of mine whom I'm trying to get rid of,asks me "Have you heard of a college named Great Lakes?? It's in Chennai.". And I'm thinking here I have just told him I am aiming for IIM's and this guy asks me of some college I haven't even heard. I reply "No, I haven't". He goes on to explain it is only for experienced people..it is very good and improving every year. Here I am thinking "Another sad DI score awaits ahead". I nod to whatever he is saying with a blank face.
I go ahead and give my CAT on the last day of the scheduled window..get my score and I wonder."Damn with this score what college will I get". I still apply to colleges looking at the ratings and rankings from numerous websites. I still don't remember what made me apply to Great lakes. I remember visiting their website and looking at the forms which asked references and I used to just close the application form. But now I believe it was for the best when I finally submitted my form. As it turns out GLIM was my first interview,first convert and my first and last MBA college as well.
It was during the Winter days of Odisha. I was waiting at the railway station to board the train for Mumbai. I was at the Station at 10 pm. The train was late. The train's expected arrival time was 4 am. I was really in trouble to spend 6 hours at railway station. I went out of the railway station and tried to pass my time. I was able to room around for only one hour out of six hours. Now I planned to get inside the station and pass my time by reading magazine. So, I purchased a magazine from the Book stall of Platform no-1 and moved on for search of a vacant seat. I was able to get a seat at the end of the platform where there was no covering. It was open to sky.
It was around 12 midnight, when a boy aged 16 came to my bench and asked "Can I sit here". I reply "Sure". The boy was alone with no luggage. He was in T-shirt with no winter clothing. I was surprised to see him in this condition. A question raised in my mind that as he seems to be from good family then why he is not having any winter clothing. A train arrived at platform no-1. The boy asked me that where this train will go. I saw the train name and accordingly answered him. He then kept quiet. I was very curious to know more about him. I asked him that where he is moving to. His answer was unexpected for me. His answer was "I don't know where I will go" . This really surprised me. The conversation between me and the boy went on and on.
Me: Why is it so? How you don't know where to go?
Boy: I have not decided till now.
Me: Are you going to relatives house?
Boy: No
Me: Are you going to friend's house?
Boy: No
Me: What is the matter?
Boy: I just want to go away from my family.
Me: Why?
Boy: They don't like me.
Me: Why they don't like you?
Boy: I don't know.
Me: Who don't like you, Mother or Father?
Boy: My Mother is dead.
Me: And your Father?
Boy: He is good. He loves me.
Me: So, who don't like you?
Boy: My step mother
Me: What she tells you?
Boy: She tells me to do all the Kitchen works such as washing the utensils, cleaning the floor, washing cloths, helping in making food, etc.
Me: What about your Father? Why he is not scolding your Mother?
Boy: He tried once but as a result she went to her mothers home.
Me: So, It means you don't have any solution other than facing the situation.
Boy: Yes
Me: In which class you are studying?
Boy: I am in 10th Class.
Me: So, as you have not even completed your matriculation, it would be very tough to get a good job. As you are not so mature so, you will not be able to survive in any of the cities.
Boy: But I don't want to be at Home by any means.
Me: You don't have any other way.
Boy: Can I come with you? Can you provide me job?
Me: Sorry, as I am studying in College and I don't have any contacts, whom I can ask for work. I can ask my Parents to help you.
Boy: I will be very kind of you.
Me: I think you should complete your studies and then go for job. You will get good job. At least you should complete 12th Class.
After so long conversation, it seemed that the Boy was convinced but he didn't reply. I provided a shawl to him to protect himself from the cold weather.
Soon it was 4 am and my train arrived at the station. I was about to move into the train now. The Boy stood up and told that early morning he will surely return home. I will really at heaven at this time as because I was able to convince that Boy to go home and continue his studies.
We should always try to help any one who is in need in the possible ways as the world is Ocean.
"Never go where life takes you. Take life wherever you go."- Myself.
The above said quote is what I preach now. Life prior to me sitting for my placements in college had various twists and turns with F being a dominant alphabet throughout - fun, frolic, family, fate, futile, fear, female, fights, friends, foes and my best friend- failure. My failures would not mean much to the world, as outside I was an 8.8 CGPA holder on the brink of a University rank. But within, I was defeated time and again in the goals I set. As I entered the room, where my interview was scheduled for a reputed IT firm, and started fumbling in the questions put forth related to programming and stuff, I got- the Eureka moment on hearing one question. "What have you prepared for the interview process??" Though it was a question put forth out of frustration by the panelist, it was indeed an eye opener for me. It struck me hard that- this was not what I prepared for. Slogging through the beaten path, the Indian dream of Engineering had been successfully crossed but what next? The coding world? The American bridegroom feel? Was that me? Several questions started finding their own answers in my head but the poor panelist soul was gulping down his coffee with frustrations all over his face." You may leave"- these where the final words he said to me. But being the department topper, at that time, the IT job was in my bag despite me ridiculing my interview. The urge and the spark brought me to the sanity I had searched within myself. That was when I saw failures as friends. After all they teach me to better my thinking and not think that my thinking is the best. Consequently, I took the first brave decision ( the proud moment) in my life- I declined the IT offer. Phone calls flowed from all parts of the world( A Big Indian Family) banging me from all sides. "What plans do you have in life?"," Your dad is a heart patient!"," You have a younger brother!"!! My parents were confused as to what I was doing but the one thing I would be grateful to them throughout life is- They never forced me to work then. My mom said-" Do what you like son! You are old enough.I will earn till I can!" My dad echoed the same. I was moved. The first step I took then was joined hands with my college mates on a startup of theirs- Eclipse Creations, a Media studio that expertises in anything and everything related to Media. I took up the post of Marketing executive( self assigned :D). Within two days, I comprehended that my vision and theirs was varied ( The main thing is the vibe in a team. If it does not set, get ur backs out!). I backed out and there I stood- Loser as they called.What I did next? To be continued....
An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and…..
Prof: So you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Prof: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Prof: Is God all-powerful?
Student: Yes..
Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?
(Student is silent.)
Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Prof: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From….God…
Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Prof: So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)
Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Prof: So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)
Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son…Have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.
Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
Prof: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as cold?
Prof: Yes.
Student: No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture the after becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat..
But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it .
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright
light, flashing light…..But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?
Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought.. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is
not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor.Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher? (The class is in uproar.)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class breaks out into laughter.)
Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)
Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.
Student: That is it sir… The link between man & god is FAITH . That is all that keeps things moving & alive.
I believe you have enjoyed the conversation…and if so…you'll probably want your friends/colleagues to enjoy the same…won't you?….this is a true story, and the
I`m sure everybody over here have an experience to share when asked about Exam results .Yeah results...... That second where we hope at least one of our prayers if not all would be answered.We have always had our fair share of fears and hopes after giving our exams. Right from my 12 standard I used to get flustered after getting to know my results .The same cycle of guilt ,shame ,remorse engulfs me .Even though after each passing exam this feeling has somewhat reduced I am still unable to I pull myself out of this sink hole.After each exam I feel I could have a bit better .Now which brings me to my main topic I have always wondered how do people set goals and toil hard for months altogether in pursuit of that goal not knowing when are they going to achieve it .In those months of hard work I`m sure they would have had their fair share of doubts . Where they begin to doubt whether this this dream is ever achievable .I`m sure for anyone who dared to dream big and did achieve that dream would have been at such cross roads .
I`m sure everybody over here have an experience to share when asked about Exam results .Yeah results...... That second where we hope at least one of our prayers if not all would be answered.We have always had our fair share of fears and hopes after giving our exams. Right from my 12 standard I used to get flustered after getting to know my results .The same cycle of guilt ,shame ,remorse engulfs me .Even though after each passing exam this feeling has somewhat reduced I am still unable to I pull myself out of this sink hole.After each exam I feel I could have a bit better .Now which brings me to my main topic I have always wondered how do people set goals and toil hard for months altogether in pursuit of that goal not knowing when are they going to achieve it .In those months of hard work I`m sure they would have had their fair share of doubts . Where they begin to doubt whether this this dream is ever achievable .I`m sure for anyone who dared to dream big and did achieve that dream would have been at such cross roads .
No. Don't Worry guys, This article is not about our friendly city bus drivers who drive like it's their last day on earth.
This is about my IIT Roorkee road journey for my MBA interview.
Since I was staying in Jaipur that time and the distance of Roorkee from Jaipur is approx 500 kms , I Decided to travel like an executive (saved some money from job fortunately :P ) So instead of boarding a bus or a train (no flight as there is no airport In Roorkee) I booked a cab from Jaipur to Roorkee and back. There! I made the mistake of booking it from an unprofessional local cab agency (not taking names it since it may effect his earnings :P).
The interview was on Wednesday morning 9 am, so to keep an extra amount of time in hand i left on Monday night 10 pm so to reach campus on Tuesday and take some rest before the interview.
The nightmare started early. A 45+ dude short, fat, football-faced with a white cap on his head chewing some paan masala parked his Indigo outside my flat. I came down , he greeted me , did not handle my luggage . I asked him to put my luggage in the cab so he opened the boot space and started checking out his cell phone. I myself took hold of the luggage and placed it safely (No wonder who looked like a boss there).
Next, as soon as I sat inside , he zeroed the meter and asked me to check it. Then he opened the front seat's window ( I was sitting on the back seat) without asking my permission (since it was the month of March and it was little cold). I asked him to close the window and he did that. After about half an hour, he told me that he was feeling hot so opening the window a bit. Since it was a night journey I decided to stay quite and let him be comfortable while driving.
The gush of air hitting the face reminded me of all the beautiful time i had spent in my life. The driver asked me if i had any problem if he played music. I said OK. So I was looking forward to the cool breeze cool music thing.Just when I heard something - 'no way' said my inner soul. He put on his mobile which looked more like a TV remote and that too a Chinese-make. THe sound was so bad that I felt some kids toys were blaring the music. I asked him to turn it off and start the music system instead but that It sounded like speakers was awful and so I asked him to turn it off and start the music system and Whoaa the music system was dead. To add to that he said he required music to keep himself awake.
Since there was no other option at that moment I decided to keep quiet. We had hardly travelled 40 kms from Jaipur by then. I slept despite the noise . Suddenly the music stopped and i woke up, I felt good but no it was too early to celebrate as it was a call on his cell phone and he was talking so loudly that the music felt better.
..To be continued
Next on what happened after reaching Delhi and the journey to Roorkee.
It has been almost six years since I completed my graduation. I still remember this crystal clear how confident I was when I passed out that next year I would be in one of the top 3 IIMs (I guess everyone knows which ones I am talking about). There was simply no other thought in my head with regards to the next move in my life. Dare I dream of something creative? No, I was supposed to join the rat race, run with the rats (no offense, I am the biggest rat) and hope to win the race. How could I be one of the 3 idiots!
And can you believe that it has been six years and leave aside the top 3 IIMs, I haven't even made it to any institute that has a 'management' in its name. Why? After all, I was confident that I would win the race. When I look back at things now and do a threadbare simulation, I know why I didn't make it. And I was baffled when I found the answer because the answer was always with me, in front of me but I dare not pursue what my heart wanted me to…
No prizes here for guessing my answer…I was always following the rat race when I knew I just don't want this life, I don't want this job, I don't want any of this. I used to fill forms of all the MBA entrance exams in India and fill forms of all possible top 30 B schools. Well I would be lying if I just said that I used to fill forms for all possible top 30 B schools because I did remember writing somewhere above that I was confident of the top 3 IIMs. For the first two years, I only filled forms of top 10 B schools, next year I added 5 more to the list and thereafter 5 more and then 10 more which totals to 30. I would happily fill all these forms, count the total amount of money spent on all this and pray a silent prayer to all the old and the new gods (Game of Thrones is such an addiction) to get me at least one call from a school. And the best part, I just wouldn't study! Well it's a lie that I wouldn't study, I did study my best for the first 2 years and the sixth year but that only lead to 2 calls in the 6th year and yes they were from schools in the range of 25-30. My reaction, I was elated! But as destiny would have it, I didn't convert either of them (I am still awaiting the final list of one of them but reject in first list says a lot for me). One of my biggest learning from all this has been a simple but a harsh truth – I just don't have the kind of aptitude these exams require. In retrospect I think I was always aware of this but how can one accept such thoughts about one's own intellect. And now that I have accepted it, I am at peace.
Did I just say I am at peace? Well, I am clearly leagues away from it. Let me put a question to you. Do you dream? Of course you do, what a silly question for me to ask. Do you do anything to turn your dream into reality? This is the question and the same question has given me sleepless nights, rivers of tears and fear of future. I work as a management consultant which is apparently one of the most prestigious line of profession and a sought after line of work. I work for a big 4 and as soon as I share this with anyone, their eyes display such immense respect for me as if I am on my way to moon to build a castle for them at once. But the reality is I don't like what I do. Am I good at it? You bet I am, and it's not just me who says it. I have always believed that whatever you do, just be excellent at it else don't do it because you are spoiling your own brand. When the thought of me not liking my job came into my head at the initial stage, I resented it like hell. I thought to myself why should I even think of anything else, I am in a job that is decent enough, pays me well and I am learning so much. But as the years went by and as my attempts at CAT/XAT went from bad to worse to horrible, I realized that all this is just not for me. I need to follow my dreams because I wouldn't want to look back at my life after 10 years and regret not taking this step.
The good news is I know my dream, I know what I want to do. What stops me? The insecure human that is me. I get nightmares when I think of leaving such a well-established job for just a 'dream'. But then, which job is well-established and secure forever. Let's face it, I will be 27 by the end of the year and I am not getting any younger to delay the chase for my dreams. Should I take the plunge or should I not? I guess I know the answer but I pursue my dreams 'not'….or may be.
As I write this letter for you,the night has fallen as it did the last time I composed a note for you, and much of it is the same. Now there is some rain added to the sky's mixture, and the sound of it is a comfort for all those that are now trying to rest. Surely you know what I refer to - that soft but steady rumbling against doors and windows, the meditation of the heavens. It reminds us that we are all on the same earth, and that everywhere in the city there are thousands of other souls hearing that same sound. We are, in some small way, together - even if in all other things we might be at odds.
I am sorry to learn that your voice was damaged years ago, and now you have difficulty talking.I can only imagine that the written word is the only way you can communicate your thoughts effectively. Hence the effort you put into each word. You said, "If I did not do this, then I would simply be silent and no one would notice me except as a passing face. Here I can be heard, at least a little, and finally hold a conversation with kind and caring souls such as yours." Thank you for the trust worth keeping,Leif.I understand what you're saying about the only way you make yourself visible to this beautiful world is through words. I am glad that you reached out to me.
Its a beautiful way to invite someone to share their world with you. I am glad you wrote this. I would want to know which places you visited in India.I am not used to writing long letters like you,Leif, but I think with time I may. I'll be happy to talk to you, talk about me and hear from you, about you.
Your letter was a refreshing change for me in times when I did not expect it. It felt like like a pleasant gush of breeze when you suddenly turn around from where you were heading to, and now you are battling your urge to turn around.
Just being educated in politics is not enough. A politician will have to blend that with the devotion and capability to work at the grassroots and produce development and progress. Educated or not, a politician needs to deliver.
You learn a lot on the field as a politician, whether from your own people or from farmers, who form a large part of my constituency. On the way, you gather experience and each type of experience in life adds another arrow in your quiver. So, whether it is my undergraduate education, or my employment – I worked with an investment bank for 6.5 years – or my MBA experience at Stanford Graduate School of Business, or my experience as a politician: they are all arrows in my quiver. Now who knows which of these arrows will, at some point of time, assist me in solving a problem?
I think of my investment banking stint as a successful one, in which I loved my job. But somewhere, I felt that there couldn't be anything more meaningful than being able to affect the lives of people directly and in a positive manner. The amount of satisfaction that it gives your heart cannot be compared with any number of zeroes on a paycheque.
Being with people, especially those from my constituency, has been an enriching experience. My professional and educational experience has taught me to always give few promises but try and over-deliver. There are two types of politicians in our country – one that over-commit and under-deliver and the other that under-commit and over-deliver. I try and be the latter. There is lots to do and I am geared for it.
Sitting in the college library, I was trying my best to study.
Kshitij, a good friend of mine made his swift way to me .
“Shantanu….so what you are doing here, I think you are free now”
After I listened to him I once thought to blow up his head with my punch n in my mind I even did.
I had an exam the next day , so you cant blame me for that punch stuff….
Still I said “yes, I am completely free”
Actually I promised him once that when I get free I would listen up to his love story sort of thing. He always wanted me to listen to his story. Every time I dodged his attack successfully but this time he victimized me.
“So now you will listen to it, I want no more excuses” he asserted.
I tried to make few serious excuses to skip his boring story (all love stories are boring)
But then there is a saying- we must not run away from our problems. We must face them eye to eye. Inspired by it, finally I said “Ok , go on with your love story”
“Its not a love story !! Its just a story of two unusual friends, one is a boy that's me n the other is a girl…that's all.”
For a moment or two I admired the way he defended himself !!
It was a lazy summer afternoon, students were crowding inside the library, of course not to study, but because of the air conditioner.
Now, my dear readers, I am going to tell you that tale by assuming myself as kshitij. So the word “I ” will mean “kshitij”
And here it begins……
“What's this man!! What the hell you are wearing n that too today!!! You are an idiot!!!!”
These welcoming gentle words greeted me as entered my college bus one morning...well, i can assure you his tone held much more surprise than the finite exclamation marks I put in the statement.
I wrestled with him for occupying the window seat n succeeded (a dream come true for every bus travelling student). I took my time to settle down while he continued with his greetings.
He stopped after some more taunting remarks. Well, he is Shashank, my good friend n we every day traveled to the most hated place on earth-COLLEGE, to unfurl the mysteries of this universe n use the results in molding our day to day life into a castle of sophisticatedly knitted technological web.(Sounds better than flatly saying “hey look,we are engineers, a unit of future unemployed force”)
I know , after reading this some of you are already opposing my idea vigorously of calling college a 'hated' place, but to them who are in B.Tech n still single, what else can you expect from their virgin lips. After a few minutes of silence, from the fear that Shashank might again start welcoming me, I started the talk. “so, what have u brought in your lunch today” I tried to start the conversation as innocently as possible. “You're a man with no brains, you are just a stupid punk! You are going to meet a girl today n you came in your usual college uniform!!!” said Shashank. My innocent topic didn't last long.
“Ok fine, so what's the big deal! We are just meeting, I am not going to propose a marriage to her, come on!!” came my saintly words.
After a long time, me n Rishika (the cause for that day's turbulence) planned to meet.
I found Rishika on facebook. It was May of 2010, I was quite new to the world of FB(which was soon going to be my second home).I requested her for a friendship on FB thinking she was the Rishika of my schooldays… After a bunch of months, I don't know why,(maybe she logged into her FB account n went away for some work n in the mean time, some alien landed into her room, pressed the 'accept request' button n vanished. That's the most logical reason I could come up with. Else there is no way, such an angel could befriend a guy with such demonic looks.) but she accepted my friend request n that's how we began to chat. And after 8 months of knowing her we finally planned to meet.
Bus finally approached the college gate, as usual I found Shashank sleeping beside me. He must have seen more than 4 movies back to back the previous night, not because he over-studied as many of our studious readers might be thinking the latter to be the cause of his early morning nap…
I entered the class…n concluded that the class was already started (not a rare scene for me).The teacher gave be a rebuking look.I silently retired to my seat. I agree, by default, teachers do have a rebuking expression all the time, maybe by birth. But this was one of a superior quality.
He started his topic with very innocent things, like –“ Suppose you got out of your home n saw a transformer”! Now , why on earth I will see that bloody transformer when I am out of my home. I have many other essential things to stare at…!
Soon that innocent topic took the form of a black board full of nightmarish equations…I knew this crap was going to happen. I was counting 1000 backwards, just wanted his boring period to get over… But then..
“And now kshitij will tell us how the transformer works on no load condition!!” said my kind teacher.
I gave a wonderful discourse on 'no load condition' but it didn't involve any transformer i.e technical stuff…again I got a 'I will kill you' type look from my, kind non violent teacher.
Some how I managed to survive till lunch n got out of college after that.
Last year I met a girl at Pagalguy named Ankita Agarwal. I was very fascinated by her cheerful attitude, her encouraging thoughts towards life and very down to earth persona. Last year was not good for both of us. We had beliefs in each other. I was crazy for MICA and she was made for IIM-A. What conversation we had is in screenshots. Dreams always comes true in life. Proof is attached in above.I am not here for bragging. But I want to convey what you desire in your life and if you are really crazy for it. God will come definitely come up with open arms to fill you, but first ask yourself what you want and then seep into sea. Good luck to all other for your dreams. "Easy things are easy when you are crazy for it... Nothing is easy when you are lazy for it. " This was the most happy fairy tale coincidence of life .
Though I have made a habit of writing you late at night, in the hours shortly before sleep should claim me, I'm afraid that I must break the habit with this newest letter. It's the middle of the day here, although you might not know it from the way in which the sun hides itself behind the clouds. It's as if Sol was unable to rest during the moon's vigil, and now that it is in the sky it cannot find the energy to burn as brightly as it should.
Like the sun, I am also coming from a small night. My eyes closed around 11pm, and but then opened at around 1am - and have been wide ever since.The reasons for this are long, and perhaps too much to go into. I know that for most life is full of some ups and downs - and so they create a system where "thinking positively" is how you solve most issues. To their way of thinking most troubles are merely a matter of perspective, and with patience you can overcome anything.
My polite response to this: They don't know what real trouble is. A real problem is one that cannot be solved by positive thinking or patience alone. If all it takes is the right perspective, then it's just wind and emotional drama. Nothing more.
So the few people I have told of my situation, they have invariably told me this advice. To be positive. To just apply yourself and be patient. That there are no real difficulties. In time then I've learned not to tell people, after hearing this too many times. I have reasons for being awake at 1 am, and they are locked away within my body for now. :)
PS:You don't have to give up on anything, even if you are ambitious. Of course, it is a matter of priorities as well. If what you seek is more important to you than what you need then naturally it will be harder to find what you really want.
On my friend's suggestion, I thought of writing on something that I have a real connect with. So I chose my hostel life. I think hostel life was one of the greatest character building exercises I have undergone. I would recommend it for all!
All of the incidents described actually took place. My memory is not the best, so forgive me if I took a few liberties, where the memories were a little too hazy for me!
I joined the hostel two months into my school term. It was my first time living away from home, and I was pretty excited! It was a preparatory residential school which had 11th and 12th standard classes, and also prepared them for various entrance exams, Medical and engineering.
My father left me there on a Sunday evening and my eyes welled up for a bit, and that evening dinner at the mess was lonely. But I soon composed myself.
The living arrangements were 8 people to a room. Considering that the room was 200 sq ft in area, it seems dingy, but it was actually quite fun. My bed was attached to a window, which overlooked the airport runway that was a stone's throw away from our campus. That night was spent in making acquaintances with my new roomies.
Six of the eight beds were filled. I was the seventh. I was informed that many had occupied the other two beds, but no man survived. They either left from being too homesick, or changed rooms. Among the other six, four of them were childhood buddies and were in school together. The fifth was a goon, and his contacts came in handy at times. The other was a new admit, who had come just hours ahead of me.
The others briefed us on the rules and regulations, and timings of all meals and classes. It was all new and exciting for me. A little too exciting. They told me how they had covered a vast portion of the syllabus and I would not cope up, how I should go back home and try out for a school there. Luckily, I held my nerve and thought logically. How far behind could I be? There had been only 6 weeks worth of classes that I missed.
Much, much later, my roomies candidly admitted that they actually wanted to get rid of me and the new guy! They had been successful till then, managing to keep their room strength to only 5.
Anyway. That night, I lay in bed, gazing at the runway lights from my window, eyes wide open in excitement, I was not homesick. I was looking forward to the two years that lay ahead.
Next morning, I was up at 5. The normal procedure was that floor coordinators woke us up at 5.30. Down the line, when we set into the routine, this wake up call would be resented the most! They used to make the aluminium latches bang against the wooden doors, all the while screaming "wake up wake up wake up !!". The hair on the nape of my neck still stands, recollecting those screeches!
6 am was assembly, breakfast at 6.30 in the mess, classes from 7. When we became regulars, wake up was at 6.15, breakfast at 6.30 when the mess doors were flung open, and prayers were reserved for special occasions like football matches and exam results!
poori subzi once more, get a dosa just like that, taste that parota and curry one last time!
I'll try and keep the article short and to the point.
As and when life happens to people, they take this word 'Destiny' in different spirits.
DENY: Stage one is when the word destiny seems a myth. We don't buy it. It seems as if we don't give a damn.Nothing else matters. Results are based on actions, no frills attached. There's nothing that has been written before and nothing that follows the lead of any of our action in future.
DEFY: When certain things go wrong despite of our efforts, or in other words, we start feeling we are one among the unlucky bunch of people who luck doesn't favors at all, we try to fix things. We fix them by probably working even harder and thus trying to go against what destiny has in store for us. That's what is probably called the 'Struggle phase' or the 'Defying phase'.
DEFINE: Post the struggle phase, a time comes when we realize whatever we have, is a result of both our hard work and luck. Here is when we define Destiny: An intelligent, situation dependent and ideal amalgam of both luck as well as efforts. We stop blaming destiny at this point and start looking for how can things be improved so we do not have to blame anyone but ourselves for our faults.
There are some people who are said to be 'Destiny's Child'. These are the ones for whom life paves way as they proceed, with the best of opportunities. Luck is with them always. Most of the hurdles are a cake walk.
But as for many more other people out there, there is always a scope to live, change and define Destiny in their own way, as and when realization dawns. Later or sooner, life gives a chance, it's for us to either make it or break it!
