An Anecdote From my Life

Jobs & Careers
106

My parents also started preparing for my exam in their own way. My mother held fast on every 3rd day. They consulted with the "family astrologer" about pleasing Rahu-Ketu who were creating a hurdle in my way to success. They asked for the auspicious dates when celestial bodies were in syzygy. The result was: I had one extra ring on my finger and the red coloured holy thread tied on my wrist. Equipped with all these divine weapons, I was prepared to charge. The day finally arrived. Six months of preparation was to be tested in two and a half hour test. Bang..!

I came out of the testing centre stupefied. I was not able to grasp what had happened. Was my paper tough? or had I failed again ? I called my friend who told me that he had a similar experience. I felt a bit relieved; realizing that the paper was indeed on the tougher side. Anyway, there was nothing that could be done now. I didn't read any of the reviews about my slot and ostracized myself from the hysteria. I didn't realise though that you can run away but you can't escape the claws of a "cat".

A week later, I got to know that questions were being leaked on social networking sites and some "lucky" ones had 2-3 questions in their slots whose answers they already knew. WHOA !! What now? Should I start preparing for the next year ? I told this to my father who nonchalantly replied, "bhagwaan pe bharosa rakho."

By God's grace, I had cracked the toughest engineering entrance exam of India back in 2007. It told me that with hard work, you can make your destiny. All you need to do is be tenacious about your goal and you will have it. But this exam made me realise some very peculiar characteristics of life. Life is not fair, your success is not directly proportional to the amount of hard work you put into. Luck will always play its role in shaping your destiny. There are somethings beyond your control. Accept this fact and live with it.

Finally, what about the results ? I don't know. I am waiting like everybody else. But I am ready to fail.

"Some goals are so worthy, it is glorious even to fail" (Lt.) Captain Manoj Kumar Pandey

Will I try again? Yes, definitely. This is the only thing I can do and I will.

This whole journey through the abyss has taught me many things and perhaps made me a stronger person. The good thing is it has not ended yet. I am still looking for an iota of light in the darkness.

But it is time to sign off..

Part 1: http://www.pagalguy.com/news/my-journey-into-abyss-a-18057366/

Part 2: http://www.pagalguy.com/news/my-journey-into-abyss-part-ii-a-18059573/r-18067178

107

A road it is , dark and quiet

Wind brisk and the scintillating sky

Alluring darkness with a silent melody

Trudging am I and this enchanting night..

Is young, with a glass of wine

offered me, a sip of intoxication, a gulp of mirth

Couldn't resist the enticement amid camouflaged dearth..

Far away those lanterns, pale n dim

A flickering glow and the cold and mist

Occasional howling and whispering trees

My footsteps random, but without twist

I see the darkness in the world of light

Mystical aura within the darkness of night

A daydream delusion, oh the delusion angel

I have no idea where I come from

I have no idea where I am going

Carry me to the shore of life where truth resides..

Quench my thirst of knowing myself and the world as mine

Under these stars, absorb me as your own..

Let my life rhyme to the beats of oneness for a while..

-kaavya

108

"Stand up you three from the last row", roared the lecturer.

"What was so funny? Come on! tell us the joke", he continued with the same pace he started with.

The same hackneyed sentence, which our teacher had fired, almost killed the spirit of ludicrous comment on which we were actually laughing.

We stood solid at our place, like scarecrows in a stark landscape.

"What was the joke?" this time he almost screamed, giving me an ominous feeling.

We were at loss of words.

"Get out from this class".

Akshat welcomed his decision with alacrity and thus we were obliged to do the same. We followed his footsteps and just when we had almost lined up at the gate and were on the verge to bid goodbye to the lecture, our teacher interrupted again, "Why it seems as if you all were waiting to go out?"

It is obvious that nobody wants to attend lectures of a teacher who writes esoteric terminologies on board, doesn't speak too much, and mostly involves himself with those sycophantic robots who sit on very first bench, nod at almost every word a teacher spills out of his mouth and enjoy penetrating every drop of ink into their registers to echo those same words during sectionals.

Giving this answer could have won me a thunderous applause from the whole class, except obviously the stoics of first bench, but not without inviting a significant trouble. So I, along with others, remained tight-lipped.

"Proceed. I have better things to deal with," concluded our teacher pointing at the gate.

***************

"See, I am not going to ask you the same thing again and again", said Anubhav, probably for the sixth time, "what you both talked about?

We were at college canteen, grabbing the bite of cold patties, complementing it with hot cold-drink.

"She asked for an outing...That's it", I replied.

They began looking at each other in disbelief.

"That's it?" said Akshat, who was looking as perplexed as Abhinav, "Come on! Let's not dilute whatever you got. Savor it. It's even better than an unlimited dinner at Le meridien."

Anubhav burst into a cry of laugh. Had it been few decibels more, it would have out of hearing range of normal human being.

"Let's see yar. We are not couples. She has no friend, I have no friend. Nothing better to do on Weekends, so she might have decided to ask this. Why it is so hard to believe?" I said.

"You have no friend? Ladki aayi doston ko bhul gya, aur ladki to abhi aayi hi nhi, aane ka bol ke gyi hai. Good my friend, thanks for hurting two Casanovas sitting here", said Anubhav and started acting like a sobbing bahu of some typical daily soap.

I couldn't been able to say anything further.

There are still 5 days to go. This week is not going to be an easy one.

to be continued...

109

attempt no# 1

hi all i m going to writer pagalguy article to improve my English and grammar that's what i thought before writing this article this is my first attempt.

as you realize from my username i am really weak and not so smart guy.and nigher i am an intelligent but i believe in hope faith and hard work which help me from my childhood to this day.

i like to read inspiration poem like invictus (i like that movie too)

watch inspiration movies , documentary and youtube videos.

regrading i am movie lover i love movies which teach me something give some different view and help me to grow more and more evolved .

i want to share some movie

two Hollywood movie on racing horse i don't remember names but they inspire me.one is about a horse which have broken leg and it is on depression days and how broke businessman and trainer teach horse and win race.

and other one is about a women who own a farmhouse and her father own pony which she raise and win race those two movie i love.

as i told i love movie weird thing is i saw movie even if i dont understand language i saw dasboot movie first in German and then in English and i love it after that i went viral and watch many documentary on youtube about uboats.

that's all for now meet me in my second article.

about me.

a shy guy

110

Day 3, Wednesday, 11 P.M.

I skipped writing diary yesterday because she was absent without realizing how grisly the day could turn out for me. Boring lectures, two overly-amusingly-smart hoax stars sitting beside me, monotonous activities, and nobody in the bench placed in farthest corner of the room with whom I could play eye game with. The only sign of respite was: No talks about "Me & Suhasi conundrum" from the two vigilant sleuths, Akshat and Abhinav.

Every morning I have a reason to go to college and today's morning was no exception.

"Oh please! Don't be absent today", I was sending my message to Suhasi telepathically.

I was not expecting the response to come the same way. I had to wait till the first, or second, or third lecture.

****************

We left our class to attend the third period which was of programming lab.

After entering the lab, every one took his or her seat without disturbing the integrity of Line of Control that had been drawn inadvertently, separating the boys from girls, fearing any chances of reproduction that might result into a specie that mankind would never be allowed to co-exist with.

After few minutes, a lady teacher entered into our lab and probably for the first time in my short span at college I was watching a teacher greeting us with a genteel smile and amicable demeanor.

"What she is doing among erudite Masters and Ph.Ds we are surrounded with?" said Abhinav, "Has she cleared her B.E. yet?"

"She is too young to be a teacher. She must have gatecrashed into this hell", I smirked.

Finally, Suhasi came and all their attention shifted to me.

"Here she comes. Please put your hands together for our one and only Bhabhijaan", announced Abhinav, and Akshat literally started clapping which didn't go unnoticed.

"Why were you clapping?" asked the teacher rudely, taking a leaf out of our other teachers' book, "Don't you dare doing that again in my class".

"Oh! Jyoti bani Jwala", Akshat murmured.

Certainly, she tried to look strict but her childlike face ditched her.

Meawhile, Suhasi had taken her seat, again at the farthest corner of the room, and till then must have had got a clear idea of why that was happening.

Madame announced, "You all have to work in a group of two. Groups formed will not change throughout the semester. One roll number from top would be be paired with one from the bottom and so on".

Adrenaline level rose in my blood. There were decent chances of my pairing with Suhasi. I contemplated the list, which was pasted on the wall near me, and tried making the pairs...

Abhinav-Yogesh...

....

...

Akshansh-Swasti

Akshat-Suraj

Ashish-Suhasi... BINGO!

I got dumbstruck.

A line from a Bollywood film reverberated in my mind, "Kisi cheez ko shiddat se chaho, to puri kaynaat bhi use tumse milaane mein lag jaati hai".

to be continued...

111

Break the knuckles of the writers

who writes love is bliss,

when they become zombies

with drug of love.

Break there skulls who are drunk with pain,

and make us to feel so

when There hottest love has the coldest end.

enough poets,

with your jugglery of words,

you make love a mystery to folks,

You win many hearts but

you all are hypocrites

((listen to me now,

add a star mark * for all your poems in the end saying

these lines not applies for all but only to blind,drunkards and hypocrites

we are rationalists and engineers))

112

Read Part II here: http://www.pagalguy.com/discussions/an-anecdote-from-my-life-16898153/17844313

Are inter-regional marriages such a hard thing to digest for our developing population that they deserved to be shunned so cruelly?

Every time she was demoralized, she built up a stronger self-defense, a refuge from the ruthless world. And every time, the ruthless world came up with more efficiently ruthless ways of strangling her self-dignity. Of crushing her will-power, overthrowing her meekest of hopes.

She had hung up till now, for all her self-worth, for the sake of her loving husband, her family. But could she hang, for life?

Her thoughts abruptly hit shore as her eyes hit the wall beyond. A faint light flickered on as she flung around. She backed away, dragging the girl, as she took in the situation.

Suddenly, unexpectedly, a voice rang out, crystal clear.

“Itni raat ko yahaan par rukna theek nahi. Kidhar jaana hai madam?”

She smiled, reluctantly. Queer ironies fate has in store. Her mind reeled. Drastically different implications through the same sentence by two different persons.

“10, Station Road. Aap chalenge?”

“Kyon nahi chalenge? Sona rakhaa hai yahaan?!”

“Kitna lenge?”

“Meter jitna dikhaata hai usse ek paisa na jyaada, lekin ek bhi na kam!”

“Half-return nahi?”

“Kanoon ke mutaabik, apun log half-return 12 bajne ke baad lete hain. Abhi paanch minat bache hain. Vaise aapko dena hai madam, to apne ko koi problem nahi hai!” :)

Feeling suspicious, she climbed in. Off vroomed the cabbie, into the pressing dark. The woman, by now, was so painfully alert that every thud she heard felt over a hundred times magnified, and every bump made her look out for a purposely muffled sound underneath it. The cabbie was at his jolliest best, blabbing away to glory.

You couldn't get a more enthusiastic guide to town, she couldn't help smiling to herself.

His innocent aura emanated exuberance and the tension in the air dissipated away.

“Madam, lambaa rasthaa naapna padegaa. Bole toh aajkal highway 12 baje bandh ho jaata hai.”

“Chaliye.”

She settled in as the driver pulled through the lazy outskirts of the city.

The gentle breeze almost lulled her into a blissful state of semi-consciousness, till....the cabbie, suddenly, ominously, stopped his A.I.R. of blabbing. Her feeling of foreboding bounced back, greater than ever. She looked him all over keenly, but the man seemed oblivious of everything but his driving.

Crazy, eerie thoughts pooled into her mind, of what the man was capable of doing to them. She tried to push the bad thoughts away, but try as she might, they bored deeper and more gorily into her imagination...

Without warning, the vehicle screeched to a halt. The child let out a wail as she was shaken out of her reverie. Fear, cold and piercing, engulfed her veins as she braced herself for any coming onslaught...

To be continued...

113

I was excited at the very thought of her sitting next to me; no matter how badly I would mess the things up with her, she had to sit next to me, for the whole semester. This was panacea of all predicaments because now I had the chance to talk to her in a legitimate way without the fear of vigilant eyes.

Madame started announcing the names to make a pair of two:

Abhinav-Yogesh...

...

...

Akshansh-Swasti...

A slight gesture of Suhasi attracted my attention. She pointed her index finger towards herself and then towards me suggesting it would be I and she in the pair. I nodded halfheartedly feigning if not she telling me, I would have remained oblivious to this till actual pairing.

Akshat-Suraj...

Few seconds later Madame announced again, "Suraj..."

Akshat was already buckled up.

"Suraj...", she cried the name for the third time as if trying to persuade him to come out of his invisible cloak.

"Ok, so he is absent", said Madame, "Who's next?"

I froze.

"Who is Suhasi?" she continued while contemplating the register.

Suhasi rose her hand and my heart sank in the pond of unimaginable depth.

"Go there", said mam, pointing her finger towards Akshat who was standing, in the fifth row, right next to me.

I made way for Suhasi to let her join the wickedest friend I ever have had in my life.

Akshat was smiling. He had effortlessly leapfrogged Suraj to get pair up with Suhasi, leaving me with a wistful heart.

"Ashish and Shivam...", mam announced again.

To me the whole allotment system was felt like vacuous; a cruel treachery I was prey of.

A computer in the second row was waiting for me.

***************

Our task was to make a program of Calculator. Ignorant of the technological advancements growing by leap and bounds, we had to make a damn 'Calculator'. I was quite sure that no matter how many fold our standard would rise in coming four years, we were not going to turn the world around us.

A new order of printing colorful posters was taken up by the college. After four years some posters are going to be pasted on colorful walls triggering awe of passers-by, while few unfortunate ones would be odiously cursed for soaking bountiful colors only to be proved worthless. Many factories are at work nevertheless.

******************

"See, I am not going to flirt with her", clarified Akshat without being asked for.

"Chill! I don't care...", I said.

"That's good because I will", he chuckled.

Had I had iron fists, I would have had dismantled his face by then.

"Do you have her phone number?" asked Anubhav.

"I have only met her twice", I replied, "How I could have asked for her phone number?"

Anubhav said ludicrously, "Today was the first time Akshat met her, and I am quite sure he would have thought of proposing her right there".

They laughed, so did I.

114

Music was my refuge; I think music in itself is healing. It's an explosive expression of humanity. It's something we are all touched by. No matter what culture we're from, everyone loves music. After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Martin Luther once said, “Beautiful music is the art of the prophets that can calm the agitations of the most magnificent and delightful presents God has given us”, but I don't believe in prophets and angels bringing this blissful feeling of music to you, all I know is that you don't look for music, it comes to you. I've known times when I use to sit in my room, alone watching the all consuming void, waiting for the moment when I get hit by the ecstasy of music and all I remember is the smile of achievement on my face. I love composing music; it's like making love to it. Listen and you hear the music, I can hear it everywhere, in the woods, the computer keyboard clicking, in the windows clinking, in the wind, in the air, it's all around us; all you have to do is open yourself up and I do it for the bliss and then forget it. I don't make music for eyes. I make music for ears and heart. The best part in composing a song and music is that, it never hurts you when it hits you but a girl's tight slap or even rejection would kill you bad. Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. In this world of mistake and misunderstanding, music can say things that people can't, so when I die I wish to be a song backed by the soul filling rhythm of music, so that people remember things I real mean to express, not somebody perception. People think weed enhances music, but in my opinion it's the other way round. I sometimes wonder about the crazy equation of it. You move around a certain scale and you still find perfection in it, well one thing is clear it's not as complicated as relationship. In this world where a marriage doesn't last for days, I suggest better marry the music.

115

today i don't like this very idea of having choices because i definitely have to choose from them. i don't know if it's with me or with you guys also or is it about the choices i have or the decision which i have to make. regret is something that we always want to avoid and that is why making a decision is such a difficult task. when we choose one thing over another then at times we regret of losing the other one. after applying several permutations and combinations we are not all satisfied with our decision and repent.

the inability to take decisions happens when from a very long period of time we never take any minor or major decision in our life-from ice cream flavour to college or from a pair of sneakers to subjects in graduation. we are so bound by our surroundings or family members that we tend to rely on them for decisions and when time comes to make any big decision we just look for some alternatives to take decision on our part.

every time it is not necessary for me to be correct but what matters is that i need to be satisfied from its result whether it's good or bad after all it's going to give me an everlasting experience. this is what i have to learn along with taking decisions not influenced by others because at the end of the day it will be my decision. i would love to live with my decision rather than bound by my decisions ."never base your life decisions on advice from people who don't have to deal with the results".

116

Yesterday, a friend got married to a girl he courted for six years. But his parents were not part of the pheras or the Reception. There were strict instructions from the boy's father against anybody from the family attending the wedding. His reasoning - Marwaris (boy's family) and Punjabis (girl's family) do not marry.

The couple would have got married much earlier but kept hoping that the boy's father would come around. In the last five years, everyone did their bit to change the father. The boy's mother pleaded and cried. The boy's elder brother and wife had marathon talks with the father. The bride and her family visited the boy's home several times to quell matters. The boy's friends tried speaking to the father on numerous occasions but everything came to nought yesterday - when the boy got married without any of his family members.

Well, not really.

Thanks to the boy's mother, it ended up as one happy wedding - only without the father. On realising that there was no way her husband was going to relent, the mother simply took over the reins. As soon as her husband left for his workplace, she started slipping out of the house for her son's. (I forgot to mention that after one of the many tiffs between father and son, when the father threatened to leave home if the marriage went ahead, it was the son who left home for a rented apartment close-by).

Once there, the mother began making all the preparations for the wedding. She instructed her older son and his family to leave home a week before the wedding on the 'pretext' of a holiday and stay with her younger son. She personally invited all relatives, warning them keep her husband out of the know-how. She went shopping for clothes, jewellery, wedding cards - with the son, to-be daughter-in-law, both, and sometimes alone. The week before the wedding, she made sure her son's home was packed with relatives and well-wishers who sang, danced and cooked good food.

All this she did between 10.00 am and 5.00 pm. Because after that she had to quickly slip back to her own home and act like she had spent the day just lazing around.

The muhurat was at 2.15 am and the day's ceremonies (primarily haldi) began early. The mother organised all the different rituals, danced, played the dhol. She even helped dress her son. The baraat was at 6.00pm. At 5.00pm, the mother blessed her son and left his house for her own. Later, she greeted her husband like usual - with a cup of tea and a warm smile.

All evening, she called her son's friends to check if everything was okay. Next day, she was back for the remaining ceremonies but only till 5.00pm.

The father still does not know. Mothers says: "All will be ok soon."

117


Dark clouds looming over my head,

And no sign of silver line in the shade,

I move forward with my heart in grave,

Nothing to fear, nothing to lose,

In the darkest of ocean, I keep on my cruise,

As the light of hope was beginning to wane,

I was standing tall against the fierce wind and rain,

Although knowing it would lead to nowhere,

To think above all, I just dare,

Facing the wrath,

In search of the destined path,


Some journey undecided,

Some quest yet to be completed,

The mystery of life, let remain unfolded.

118

At the MBA interview...

My Co - Interviewer to a Fauji Candidate: Look in B School it is not like in the Army where you can order around by pointing a gun at your orderlies...

Fauji: Sir I really do not know where you get that impression from. You possibly cannot do that when everyone around you is carrying a gun...

.

.

.

.

.

Me (After the Interview): Let's ADMIT him Sir...

119

Friday, 11.35 P.M.

Since Monday every morning I had been getting ready for the college with the same ebullience, only to return home, dejected. Days were slipping, so were my chance to reinvigorate the idea of outing that might have had been ignited too early by Suhasi, only to let let it die its own death. How I could have asked her for this again? For last two days there wasn't a single word that had been exchanged between us. Sunday is nearing, probably at much slower pace.

But today wasn't at all like any other day.

****************

To my surprise first lecture was free and she wasn't absent. It was probably the first time she was there in the class attending the first lecture and she might have sacrificed taking a bath for this. There were not more than 10 students in the class in which more than 6 were there around her.

Oh! Suhasi... damn your gregariousness...I whispered to myself.

Anubhav was lying flat on the bench absorbing his quota of sleep and I was thinking about ways to infiltrate the Z security that Suhasi's friends had built around her to keep her secluded from rest of the world.

I looked at my watch sixth time. 2nd lecture was on its verge to start.

**************

"You haven't talked to her, Right?" whispered Anubhav while lecture was flowing smoothly, veering all my attention back on Suhasi.

"Na", I replied continuing to copy letter to letter from board.

"Kya yar, tu bhi fattu hai", he exclaimed.

"What can I do? Her friends never leave her alone. How am I supposed to talk?"

"The way she talked to you when we were sitting here on Monday. You see! how straight forward she was. She came, she asked, simple!", said Anubhav.

Yes. She had come to me. Now it was time to settle the dues.

**************

"Hi!", I muttered.

"Hello", she replied with a gorgeous smile.

It was lunch time and there couldn't have fewer friends around her.

"So, How are you?" I asked.

"Good! Hostel is a real fun place to be. No T.V., Wi-fi is down, no laptop to take use use of that Wi-fi when it is up, seniors almost dance over our heads, but overall AMAZING!" she exclaimed sarcastically.

"My week was as amazing as yours", I said, "Well I think we still have something better to do on this Sunday".

"I thought you forgot that plan", she said.

"No, I haven't. So not a problem?"

"Of course not."

"Good...(pause) Can I have your phone number?" I finally asked to her after pumping all the confidence in me.

"Ya sure!"

***********

From this week onward our college is going to be 5 days a week that means tomorrow is a holiday. It could have been a curse had I not taken her phone number.

Sunday is all I am waiting for...

to be continued...

120

When I signed off on Friday I had a message waiting for me. Needless to say, since I am mentioning it here it must have been from Suhasi. It was a reply that had come after a wait of 3 hours.

"Hi! You tell me, you have to pick me up so it's your choice," she replied when I asked about the venue. After all sorts of negotiations we settled on a popular (populous) mall, which I loathed. So it actually turned out to be solely her choice.

Our conversation didn't stop until midnight, but everything was not hunky-dory.

The message read: "See Ashish, I know you are mature enough but still I don't want any sort of complications. I really like you and would love to be your friend always, until you do anything stupid. So no gifts and no emotional stuff. Well, I know you are not sentimental kind of boy but still a word of caution :D".

That day I came to know to what extent an emoticon can suppress the causticity of a message. I had no intentions to do all that she was alluding to.

"I have no intentions to do whatever you are talking about. Not at all" I messaged back.

"Am I this ugly? hahaha..." read her message, "well I am going to bed. See ya! Good Night".

***************

It was the day I had waited for last 6 days. Albeit, Sunday had always been the day I would wait for whole week ever since my parents admitted me into pre-school without taking my consent, but this time there was an altogether different reason.

On second thoughts, I was confused about my own ebullience. I didn't know why I was so excited because she was 'not' going to be my girl-friend and it was not the first time I was meeting a female-friend. It was hard to caption the thoughts in my mind.

5.00 pm. - that was the time I was supposed to pick her from college.

********

"Kaisa lag rha hai?" I asked my sister for her comments on my shirt and jeans.

"Where are you going?" She asked, instead of replying.

"Movie, with school friends. Btaya to".

"Nahi pehle kabhi itna puchha nahi tune about your dressing that's why I was asking. By the way, mast lag raha hai," my sister grinned.

It was 4.30 pm - I left for my meeting.

I did not realize that later in the evening, both Suhasi and I would discuss the same stupid thing we had spoken about last night.

to be continued...

121

ohh my god..!!..is that me..??.....hi..!! i am shraddhaa..and this was my reaction when i saw my final yr result..haha..funny is'nt it..obvio!! for a girl like me..it was a dream come true.. i was the 1st engineer of my family..that too a girl-mechanical engineer....looking back into the past..now i can only recall the 3 days of my life..1st..the day when i decided of being an engineer..n was an aspiring engineer. 2nd..the day when i got admitted in an engineering college... and 3rd and the best 1..the day when i graduated..

i had hard time mugging up all those things..had completely lost hopes of graduating this year..bt at the same time a sanguine thought kept on wandering in my mind...n which actually spoke up the true side of me..yes..!! this was me..i never bothered to know what people think about me.....b'coz of my bad performance in the 1st 2 years..teachers thought i m the same girl who is here just to take a degree..never the less they did never considered such students..so no doubt i was amongst those students..but...again the same..it was of no concern to me.. unlike the other despo girls of our class who were all the time behind those not so cool guys of our class, i was preety sure what i m here for..n what i gotto do here..

the day i graduated...i felt like i gave a tight slap on those loser faces who thought i was a loser..but anyways they got their answer that very day..with me not even speaking a word..!! its true..no need to explain to others what u r..when ur success can speak a million words..!!

this was an anecdote from my life..and now i m busy preparing for my next goal..!!...AND THE LIFE CONTINUES.........

122

So what in the world is T.A.N.G. you ask? Well I came up with this droll abbreviation after scraping by in my midterms, it stands for Tobacco, Alcohol, Narcotics and Girls. How had I led myself to such a sorry pass? It dawned upon me that none of the aforementioned distractions (and I'm not being misogynistic here when I refer to girls!) were responsible for it, not in any slightest way. Then what the hell was sucking me towards the event horizon?

Here were people who barley made the cut in the entrances and the branch cutoffs and now they're in the running for the highly coveted title of "Branch Topper". I on the other hand went from being a very bright student throughout my school years to being just another 7 pointer. How the mighty have fallen! Having being raised in a orthodox family with the right amount of love and rigidity inculcated within me a sense of self discipline. It was this self discipline that help me stay clear of T.A.N. when it really screwed many of my classmates badly. One such case was the girl of my class who landed in the I.C.U. after a going on a vodka binge. Make no mistake, I do have plenty of friends who come from Venus, it's just that I am too shy and chivalrous to be someone's boyfriend.I was looking for a serious relationship, in it for the long run, but discovered that here the "wham bam thank you ma'am" affair is in vogue. In this place being a bad boy pays off. So I realized that my time and efforts would be better spent someplace else.I drifted in and out of gaming, blogging and bunch of other random stuff. Things academically didn't get any better. I felt stifled and and helpless. Some fellows would go argue with the professors for 1/2 a mark, yes 0.5 and would cuss profusely(afterwards of course) if the poor sod didn't relent to their demands.

After one long phone call from home, it hit me like a ton of bricks, it's procrastination that has been my undoing. To all those reading this, I have one very important piece of advice - NEVER PROCRASTINATE!!! It's a silent and deadly dream killer. After being burnt, I have emerged wiser. Don't count me out yet, I've come this far I'll finish this, for this is my baptism of fire. Wish me luck :)

123

I was in my third year. Dreams were simple and almost achievable. Parents were enthusiastic. Neighbors more than enthusiastic. Class-mates and friends would spend all their time between coaching institutes and libraries. The common topic of discussion would be Quant sums and Vocabulary words. Everyone wanting to know what the others are upto. But I had a simple life and a simple dream.

Somewhere I had read that we should live in present and not worry about the future etc. I followed it without an argument not because I was lazy, but because I wanted to be at peace. Things changed, time passed and then suddenly one morning you find that you are left far behind and the world has moved on. The priorities of your friends have changed but yours is the same. I decided to pace up. I wanted to know what others are upto.

I joined institutes and now my life was also juggling between college and coaching institutes. My simple little dream was crushed under the pile of learning materials and the books I filled with Quant sums. Mocks and scores became the lingo of the town! Everyone started to ask about the date of exam! And then, D day! I wasn't sure how I performed. But, from there, began a long journey of exams and scores!

Life had become okayish! I wasn't sure if I wanted this. But then now, it was Prestige and Ego at stake! I was okayish! I got a few calls to my surprise (even with my lax attitude) but could not convert any! Still I was Okayish! Another year! Another exam! But that year took away all the okayish attitude I had! I realized what I was pursuing and what it needed! So, finally I realised that its okay to have had an okayish year since it is what taught me the valuable lessons I would have never learnt otherwise and its better than to be okayish your whole life!

To all the MBA aspirants who have got no clue what they are pursuing and are doing so just for the heck of it! Nothing wrong in pursuing it but sooner or later the realisation will strike you and let that be sooner rather than later. All the best !

125


“All work & No play, makes Johnny a Dull Boy” and “All play & No work, makes Johnny a Lazy Person”.

So the only key to be Successful, Happy & Satisfied is to strike a balance between the two extreme points of any activity, like Work & Play in the above case.

As I am a student myself, I will stick to a student perspective and my examples & stories will revolve around a student's life. So here it goes.

You may have seen Nerds & Geeks around you. They may be experts in what they do, but are they really Happy & Satisfied? Most of them are NOT!

Same with the Cool People around you, who enjoy life to the fullest and do anything, that makes them Happy. But, are they Satisfied with their Life? Again, Most of them are NOT!

The sense of Happiness & Satisfaction comes, when we've got everything we need and our Life is as the way we want it to be, and then the feeling of becoming Successful comes from within.

So, the quote 'Work while you work & Play while you play' comes handy here. A student, who makes the most of his time i.e. Study when it's time to study & Play when it's time to play, is always Happy & Satisfied in life and needless to say Successful too. A Person who completes his duties & responsibilities and at the same time enjoys his life as well will always be satisfied and never regret for his activities.

We have to strike a perfect balance in everything we do in life. You cannot sit at home & relax for the whole day and on the side, staying out of home all day long is not a good idea either. You have to manage your activities and balance them according to the time and situation.





You cannot be too good as people may exploit you and also you cannot be too bad either. Being too selfish is wrong and too benevolent is foolishness. In short, everything done at its extremes is either illogical, wrong or foolishness. The only way is to get 'Best-of-Both-Worlds' by maintaining a healthy balance.

A guy who has no friends is lonely and unhappy in life as he has no one to share or care and on the other side; a guy who has loads of friends is too socially outgoing and has no time for his self-growth or self-development. So, maintaining a balance in this case is having a set of few good friends for having a good social as well as personal life.

This can be applicable to anything (mostly) that we do in our life. Maintaining a balance in everything we do, will help up surf on the waves of life safely & happily.

So finally concluding it, 'Balance' is the key to everything in life.

126

She had already forbidden me to bring her a present; I had had no intentions to bring her one. I reached the college where I was supposed to meet her. I was way ahead of the schedule but I had to wait as calling her half an hour early would have proved me too desperate to be a friend of.

She called after a few minutes to ask whether I left for the college or not. I lied.

********

Every time I came close to her my heart skipped a few beats and this meeting was no exception. It had been around 1 hour since we had met but I was still struggling to find words and whenever I found they seemed incongruous with what I really wanted to imply.

She had the lion's share of all the chat we were having. Over a short stint at pizzahut I was acquainted with her family background, her grades, her alma-mater, the friend she hated, the friend she proud of calling her friend, her roommate etc. etc. I was responding with just a smile.

If you think that there is hardly anything common between you and the girl you are meeting with, let her take the lead and she would make you feel like there is hardly anything uncommon between she and you.

***************

She stared at her cell phone. It was already 7.30 and to avoid any trouble she was supposed to be right at the gates of the hostel not after 8.00.

We had spent last 2 hours wandering into shops, talking almost everything we could have talked, discussing weird creatures that had come as complementary with college and taking note of every couple that seemed awkward that evening. Finally we came to a halt and sat on a bench which was right in front of a toy train. She was calm unlike the evening which was getting more spruced up with passing time. She was staring the children laughing and urging their parents to look at them riding the toy train. I didn't know why she was so hypnotized by that little train. I didn't want to disturb her as this was my chance to pacify my heart which had lost its usual pace.

Light of the Evening had almost disappeared and replaced by a few artificial lights which were illuminating her face. A gush of air played with her hair. She was still staring at the toy train, oblivious to the surrounding, oblivious to what my adrenaline was up-to, as if she was trying to savor all the events of her childhood through those kids who were happily waving their hand from the train. Amid all past memories she might have conjured in her mind I interrupted.

“Do you like me?” I asked

“Of course I do, that's why I am here,” she replied.

“Do you love me?”

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