An Anecdote From my Life

“Amma! Look!”

The little girl came bobbing down the lit podium, two fat trophies clenched in her bantam hands. The top of her tiny head barely visible above the two patches of glistening silver, she came bustling straight into the woman's arms, dizzy with excitement. The woman felt proud of the little girl, her miniature bundle of talent; of her own ability of bringing up the child as genuine a fairy tale as can be, in the face of profound hurdles. The applause, sweet, jingled in her ears, as she scooped up all three as un-clumsily as she could, her arms already overladen with baby and bags. And at that fateful moment of reunion, poof! went the lights.

The entire school was plunged into darkness. Peons and staff rushed about the suddenly sinister premises in apparent confusion. The Annual School Gathering of M.I.T. had almost reached a well sketched-out conclusion, with the prize-distribution ceremony being the last but one. The Headmaster, having forsaken his congratulatory end-of-function speech, had zipped away in his Jaguar minutes ago. No one considered it worth spending a few thousand units of completely-funded power to start up the sole generator of the institution to see its menagerie safely outside. However, with no clue how, the entire campus emptied in ten minutes flat. With the lady and her crew left stranded at the gate. The girl clung to her, her smile of triumph astray, as the baby fought for escape. Hesitantly, the woman approached the watchman fumbling with the lock.

“ Excuse me…suniye bhaiyya…”

“Memsahib, jaldi ghar jaiye. Itni raat ko yahaan akele rukna theek nahi.”

And the next second saw him furiously pedaling away on his bicycle.

So much for the advice, she sighed.

Once again, she was left completely alone at an unearthly timing in an alien city at one of the only two places she was familiar with (the other, being home), with no car. Her husband was away on tour. As he was, most of the times. She didn't know the local language. And she had two kids, and baggage in tow. But she couldn't linger there for eternity. She shouldn't.

She got out of the lane and into the main road. The few souls in sight passed her by as if she were invisible.

At least, I know the place I am in.

And, as if hope begets hope, a cab stole across the baleful road towards her. Relief, warm and fiery, crept over her skin, erupting into goosebumps.

“10, Station Road.”

“Baithiye, memsahib.”

The lady thanked all her lucky stars as she cajoled her kids in. What would she have done, but for the god-sent chariot?!

Five minutes into the journey, the hope that was apparently begotten revealed its true self. The cabbie led his beauty into a desolate by-lane.

“Memsahib, full return mangata hai.”

“Kya? Lekin…aapne pehle kahaan bataaya...”

To be continued...

Yesterday at a college reunion party, I met my old time friend. In wee hours of morning, after a few pegs down, he told me three things, which appeared to me as true as Newton's Laws. I'll narrate them to you :

“I'll explain u the basic structural difference between the two systems of marriages..

1) In case of love marriage, u first fall in love (freely, naturally & unconditionally). Then it leads to marriage which is the right culmination for a journey of true love – uniting two individuals and two souls. Whereas, in case of arranged marriage, u marry first and then fall in (or try your best to fall in) love with the person you married. You are never sure whether your love was free, natural and unconditional or not – as u already found yourself engaged/married to the girl whom you love now. U will never come to know whether you would have still loved the same girl had she not been engaged to you.

2) In case of love marriage, there is an entire process of winning of hearts. U begin from scratch when u are a nobody to her. Then u prove urself better than so many others trying to impress her, and eventually, slowly and gradually carve out a space for urself in her heart and then win it completely. In case of arranged marriage, she is already yours. Boy, u are given a launch pad and escape velocity; u just have to keep going to reach the moon. U will still reach the moon, but u'll never know whether could have done the same had a launch pad not been given to u. Whether she would have still given her heart to you if she had a choice to not to give.

3) There is a kick in love marriage. In case of love marriage, you fall in love despite being afraid of strict parents, social acceptance, and so on. So much so that sometimes you find entire world against you, yet you cant stop falling in love with her. And when you do marry her, you have a sense of achievement and pride. In case of arranged marriage, things are provided to you on a platter. You fall in love because you are supposed to and not because you didn't have any other option but to fall in love.

Bas yahi yaar.. The castles of love built in an arranged marriage and a love marriage can look equally beautiful.. par arranged marriage wale pyaar me wo ek baat missing hai… we will never get a chance to marvel at its foundations..”

I don't know what he told was correct or not, par uski baat me dam to hai.. Origin of any feeling is the most vital part.. And whether the origin of your love was pure and selfless can only be judged by looking at its foundations.. And foundations is where, my dear friend, Love Marriage wins. Undoubtedly.

Read Part I here: http://www.pagalguy.com/discussions/an-anecdote-from-my-life-16898153/17826864

“Ab bataa rahaa hoon na, madam. Kyon baat ko bevajah bigaadne par tuli hui hain! Aapke liye kaunsi badi baat hai!”

Expectant, secretive smile.

“Main half-return doongi…aap hi ke association dwaara banaye gaye rules ke mutaabik. Aap…aap zabardasti nahi kar sakte..."

The next minute witnessed the cabbie pulling up his vehicle to a screech, pulling the helpless woman and her kids out mercilessly, and driving away, malice in his eyes and ice in his voice.

“Paregaon se aake akadh dikhaati hai, saali!”

Classic! She'd forgotten. Misery begets itself more than hope does. Much, much more. Fate seemed to take heavenly delight in tossing her around. Picking up her own words and transforming them into double-edged tools. Now she didn't even have a name for the ground she ventured an uncertain step forth. The girl clung on tighter, and she felt like clinging back....

AS THE WOMAN SAW IT...

The pitch dark alleyway loomed in front of her like Satan. Derelict structures bordered the lane; occasional void shrieks and dog howls punctured the pristine silence of the night, sending shivers down her spine. The kid looked ready to rustle up a bigger racket, but the girl was unusually quiet. She felt her mom crumbling, else she'd never lean on her like now. Little as she was, her tummy ached for nourishment, and her body for the soft fluffy bed at home. But she bit her lip, and hung on closer to the trembling arm.

The lady responded almost involuntarily. Unshed tears burned her eyes as the bitterness she held towards the city came crashing down upon her, all over again. The injustice she'd suffered as a newly-wed bride at the hands of the town; the coldness of the society residents when they inducted her into the apartment, the curt, jeering, so-called welcome-to-a-new-home function; the long, lone periods she suffered when her husband went out of town, the piercing back-bitching the fellow moms of her daughters' friends did, the demeaning way in which the local bhandiwala tried to take advantage of her incompetence in Marathi. How the next-door Mrs. Something had turned up with a card and a box of parsnips in the first week of her 8th month into pregnancy.

At least, she bothered to come, bit back her mind.

True, she agreed. No one else did.

Oh! How many times she'd wished she could throw up everything then and there and rush back to...home. To friends, to dad. Even Bombay was better. At least, the people there appreciated the fact that you existed; existed as a human being not devoid of emotions. They called it the Oxford of the East. Rechristened it as the Maharashtrian Capital of Culture and Education. Is this the manner in which "cultured" and “educated” people behaved? Does development, improvisation, progress, civilization..ah! civilization warrant, or rather, imply this?

Ignorance? Or arrogance?

To be continued...

Dear No-Longer-a-Beloved,

While I try to respond you, let me make it very clear that my reply is, in no way, meant to alleviate the grievances and complaints that you've expressed with your heart against me in your outrageously passionate and disheartening letter. Hence, you may choose to ignore this response and continue living in your fake world, where a righteous shift from the darkness of death towards the brightness of life is termed as 'an act of a cheat' and where a person, trying to break the shackles of worldly deceptions to emerge a winner, is baptised as 'utterly selfish'. Melodrama at its best. But alas! I don't buy it anymore. Not from you at least. Excuse me for that.

Not that I differ from the facts expressed in your letter. You and I did enjoy a wonderful relationship for three years in the past. Two worldly souls, one heavenly connection, and an endless flame of romance. I couldn't agree more with you on these flamboyant metaphors of fire 'n' smoke. You did describe this flame of love appropriately in your argument. But what you forgot to describe was the 'burns' that this romantic flame gave me during those years. You correctly illustrated the sanctity and holiness of a selfless relation, but failed to mention the number of times I tried to slaughter my own beautiful life for that one single worthless 'desire'. This was never a square deal. It could never have been. All it had was a few supposed moments of joy to offer on one hand, and a priceless mind and body at stake on the other. Therefore, my dear friend, I chose to abstain from you. Once, and forever. Excuse me for that.

The decision of leaving you was not an easy one. Neither did I think, it would ever be. With the kind of influence you had over my body and my mind, it was hard to deal and to come out of it as normal. The wonder you very proudly named as 'strong love', was nothing but a 'death trap', which looked so enticing and alluring from one side, but had an end full of 'smoke & gasps' at the other. A magnificent gift of life that God had bestowed me with, could not be ended in the obscure depths of a breathless ocean. A prosperous life that I had always wanted to live, could not be taken to the state of absolute destitution with my own hands. All my ambitions, desires & inspirations were not meant and fostered to be lost in a night full of sorrows and miseries. Hence, I abandoned a worldly possession and decided to call it a day for a supposedly strong relation. Yes! I decided to dump you. Dump you, with no regrets at all. Excuse me for that 'A Burning Cigarette'.

Sincerely,

An Ex Chain-Smoker

To read 'HER' letter to me see: http://www.pagalguy.com/discussions/an-anecdote-from-my-life-16898153/17769531

As i begin to scribble in this coveted webpage where many a wonderful successful lives have been woven from scratch,i can't help but introspect myself.

As Paulo Coelho has wonderfully put it in "Its very difficult to accept the things we deserve without guilt".i plead guilty to that.It's very difficult to embrace the feeling of success or to take that final step in your journey when you've had a lot of failures.You can yell it to the world that you wanna win and conquer but deep in your heart,you know that "you" aren't meant for victories,you aren't meant to hold them glorious trophies,you just know that you aren't cut out for that top brass. you've always been playing second friddle to someone or other.You've always been that student in school with grades not as good as the topper but nonetheless nowhere near them dumb kids.you've always been good at sports but never as confident to pursue it as a career,nonetheless passionate enough not to do away with it altogether.You are me if you've always been that kid who could have had " "............

Every now and then there are things that reignite that foregone fire or that long lost passion in you and in no time you find yourself making loud empty promises to yourself in front of the mirror.But just as quickly your eyes flare up with shallow hopes,it fades away with the same swiftness. Many a time you find yourself abased,situations abhorrent and pledge to make it all right but every such time,your real self storms through and just like a pendulum,you are back at your-loser-self in absolutely no time.Your fickleness pays way to escapes,the i-didn't-really-want-it-anyway dialogues and the diffidence/self doubt in you takes you to the realm of excuses and well we all know how helpful are excuses in any regard.

Failure is like a disease but being grinded in between success and failure is like an epidemic for the soul.It keeps eating you from inside and doesn't even cause death.It makes you feel(at times)that you have it in you to touch the sky and in the very next moment pushes you to rock bottom.

It's a constant battle between who you always have been,who you are and who you want to be.

FEEL FREE TO CRITICIZE.

#"you" referred to in paragraphs is an effort to generalise,abate abstrusity.

#not an anecdote.

For two hours a day, two days in a week, it feels like most of the world is silent – the only words hitting the ear drum with pressing constancy are that of Krav Maga teacher Sensei Sadashiv Mogaveera commanding to "go for the groin."

He gives this command a hundred times (a little exaggeration) in the two days, and after a couple of Krav Maga classes, the instructions finally enter the psyche and get permanently embedded in the brain. And they keep playing, over and over again like a bad LP.

But that still does not make it easy to attack the groin, even during Krav Maga class. The men wear groin-guards but for many of the female students, the fight is actually in getting the instruction from the mind to the floor of the class and at some point on to the street.

Krav Maga which is styled after Israeli combat techniques came to India only a decade ago. It is unlike Judo and Karate which emphasises on stylised moves and where progression is based on different coloured-belts. Krav Maga, simply put, makes a learner physically and mentally street smart and more aware of his environment. Explains Sensie Sadashiv: “While in other martial arts, the stress is on attaining excellence in form; this one focusses on using natural reflexes to fight off an attack, making it more fluid and practical for self-defence.”

Sensei Sadashiv is an IKMF certified Instructor for Civilian, Military, VIP and children.

During training, women are usually pitched against men so that they get a taste of real life scenario. And as a student, there is no better feeling for a woman student than pinning down a guy after breaking his defence totally.

The training is tough – more than an hour is spent in warm-up which is everything from running, squatting, push-ups, sit-ups, and somersaults, high-jumps, crawling on one's elbows, running backwards, running on one's knees and much more - all jumbled together.

Post the warm up, the fight training starts. Different defence and attack techniques are taught. From striking with a knife to warding off a knife attack, punching and ducking a punch, mugging and staying clear of muggers, choking and breaking free of a choke, hitting and side-stepping a blow.

Students fight each other. At the end of the class, a few sport bruises. Some even meet with minor accidents but it is all part of learning. Sadashiv and his team know well to control the odd student who sometimes get aggressive and 'into the character' while fighting.

While most learn Krav Maga for self-defence, a few come just for the activity since it is an excellent full-body workout.

So 'real' is the training that after a few lessons of Krav Maga, the dishum dishum of Hindi movies appear totally senseless and stupid - somewhere a feeling of wanting to engage in a real street fight creeps in.

Write an article in response.

The night is all dark

I know might be we are apart

you told me to be happy all the way

I tried hard but didn't find a way


The night is so deep

I was always a freak

But I did whatever I could

Have had whatever I should

Now you also closed your window

Tell me Where do I peep??


The night is so calm

I looked at my palm

Thought, is it because of this?

That you're so far away

But I was stupid couldn't manage my way


The night is too intense

That I can not sense

But I can sense you

In morning, In noon, at night

But you forgot I had a heart too

You moved on leaving behind the feelings that were true.


Should I regret?

Should I feel guilt?

For not being with you

In the times when I needed you


Should I deduce you left me

Having afraid of the hurdles came into my way

Or I made you to leave me

letting you down by my deeds, they say


I know you're strong enough

You'll move on leaving everything behind

You'll pretend to be tough

But when you'll look in retrospect

One thing you'll always find

And that's “” me””

Waiving you good bye

Wishing you a happy life

As time passes by.


The night is so soothing

As you'll come in my dreams

We both will cherish our wonderful memories behind the scenes

Where no one would ever find you

As I have feelings very few

But they are true


In that night I'll make my love story eternal

As I'll be goin' the very next morning on my funeral

Having had you once in my life time

And that once will be forever

As our love would be a shrine.


I know it all sounds so fake

But it's all that I could manage to make

Out of the thoughts of my bloody head

The tears that I shed

Cost nothing more than you

As you always know how much I love you.

Life has its own sense of humour; I found it hard to laugh though when I was pick-pocketed at the Howrah Railway Terminus on the eve of my birthday.

It was around 10 pm, I was standing in the ticket counter queue when I first noticed this peculiar man. A fellow in his late twenties, he was wearing a hooded tee and sports shoes, seemingly from a 'decent' family. He looked like he had been crying for a while and was in a lot of trouble. He was just standing there next to the ticket queue, staring at everyone as if he wanted to say something.

I think he noticed me noticing him and walked up to me. After a minute of awkward silence I asked him, "Ki holo?" in Bengali, realizing soon that he didn't speak Bengali. He was a "Hindustani", as my grandma likes to call those who speak Hindi. I asked again, "Kya hua?." He spoke in a broken voice, choking every few words, ostensibly due to the crying. He told me that he was from Delhi, and that all his stuff including his wallet, watch, cellphone, and luggage had somehow got stolen in the train. I was almost at the ticket counter and realized that I could just ignore him. After all, you see people like him everyday trying to knock people off for some quick buck all the time.

After a few cross-questions to verify his authenticity, he showed me the copy of a GD (general diary) made at the GRP and finally requested me to get him a ticket to Delhi and maybe some food. Meanwhile it seemed my train was on time for the first time.

As much as I wanted to help, I had very little cash on me. Finally he told me that he had a duur-ka aunty in Dhanbad. I bought him a ticket to his aunt's town and spared very little cash so that he could buy some food before running to board my train.

It seemed my night of misery was just beginning; I accidentally boarded the wrong train in a hurry. I quickly disembarked, habitually feeling my back-pocket for my wallet and realized to my horror that it wasn't there. I figured that it must have been pick-pocketed in the train. I had lost all the IDs including my PAN card, voter-ID, my driving license as well as my debit card. Oh! and guess what, I had lost my ticket to travel as well.

I've often wondered why the police didn't help that man contact his family or why he didn't just use my cellphone to call someone, or maybe use Facebook to ping some friends of his situation. Maybe he had just panicked and couldn't think of anything, or maybe I got taken for a ride. Who knows!

I tried to forget you,but it ended up in reminding every single moment with you. I want to forget you,but your face comes to my memories giving all positive vibes of life . I can never find the reason,but your face gave some sort of happiness to me,

And your smile it meant a lot ! You always kept me under your spell . I still remember that first big smile . I still remember the day I walked with you!! I still remember every lame things I did to turn your attention towards me. I still remember the day I spoke to you.I still remember when you waved at me for the first time.I still remember how much I use to hate holidays just because I cant get a glimpse of you.I still remember the first time I held my hands with you.. I still remember every single moment with you.....! Though I wanted to avoid you ,its you your face which has always pulled me towards you. I longed for that happiness.

Why do you always take me to the world of fantasies, I wonder why do you always stay unaffected .

Once again god,Isn't he partial when comes to our life. Is it a mistake being a coward,sometimes it feels right being a coward. Life please don't ditch me again.

This is my first ever article online. Although, I write but till date it was confined to me only. To an extent, I don't care what people think about me but while typing it on web, I feared because it was going to be public (I am not a gregarious person).This fear had put me on a sticky wicket. My contemplation was supported by my courageous attitude.

Initially, when I heard the name of a site like pagalguy.com quoted by a knowledgeable teacher in a coaching class of mba, the first thought that came to my mind was " Is he serious ? Does he think of us as jerks ?" I rested my soul by ignoring it. After attending the class , I went home in full spirits and narrated the whole story in a satirical manner . I didn't know then that i will myself become a laughing stock amongst my two friends . mere to totte hi udd gaye the !

I finally decided to put my views online . I started typing in PG . Suddenly, I felt as if the words just got lost . I felt as if I was writing my first essay! So I stopped writing and read a few articles , I felt as if I just can't do it. I closed the pagalguy community and took a rough register . I again started writing whatever came to my mind .The whole process of writing an article of just 297 words took 5 days and I wasted almost 4 pages cutting , enhancing the language , improving the sequence. Honestly ,I don't know how good I have done in CAT but I finally realised the importance of para completion , para jumbles , critical reasoning and most importantly " The verbal reasoning section in various competitive exams ".

CAT zindabad!

SHE talks, I listen...

SHE shouts, I pay attention...

SHE cries, I sympathize...

SHE gets jealous, I feel obliged...

SHE gets hurt, I feel the pain...

SHE shouts, I cool her again...

SHE smiles, I feel happy...

SHE makes me understand, I feel like been in a nappy...

SHE throws attitude, I laugh over it...

SHE shows ego, I feel its complete shit...

SHE shows her brilliance, I hide mine...

SHE says she is brighter than me, I say it's completely fine...

SHE shops, I pay...

SHE says you are so sweet, I have nothing to say...

SHE hates me, I still love her...

SHE might leave me, I would still keep waiting for her...

Regards,

Abhijeet(Gladi).

The following short story is based on a true account, narrated to me by my friend. Some of it is true, most of it is a figment of my imagination.

"After my 12th standard, I applied and got through to a Government Engineering college situated on the Orissa- Andhra Pradesh Border. it was located on the foothills of a small mountain, and the campus was spread over a large tract of reclaimed forest land. The natural landscape appealed to the explorer and nature lover in me. I was thrilled to be in a place of such beauty!

After the few initial days that it took to familiarize myself with the area, I formed my own adventure club! We were a group of boys from the hostel. Every night, after dinner at the mess, we used to explore the adjoining forest and grounds. Each night, torch in hand, we would choose a new direction to travel, and since most of the areas had security guards, there was no real danger.

We became quite well acquainted with the security guards. Most of them were local villagers who were employed by the college trust, when they bought the land. Our favourite was 'Shankar Anna'. He was the oldest amongst the guards, and supposedly the bravest too! There were several areas on campus, where the guards refused to patrol alone at night, but Shankar Anna had no qualms spending his night duty in solitude. He was one of the first employees of the college. He had joined when the land had just been acquired, and watched as it was cleared and leveled to make it suitable to build a college.

Shankar Anna had interesting bits of information to offer. He had topographical knowledge of where we would encounter lakes or streams, where we could spot deer, or where we could find some caves to explore. He was indulgent of our inquiries. But he had one word of caution. "Don't go towards the north-western edge of the campus. There are no guards in this direction, even I don't venture there. If you happen to go that way, avoid the old Ashoka tree there. The local tribals thought it was very sacred, and they insisted we do not go near it. They even built a hedge around it, and planted Bougainvillea on the hedge, marking the area around the tree."

Anna never said anything else. He always grew visually uncomfortable whenever we mentioned the area. So we heeded his wishes and didn't venture towards the North western edge of the campus.

Atleast not on purpose..........

Continued-

Bougainvillea II

Bougainvillea III

Bougainvillea IV

Continued from....

I remember that evening; India had won the T20 world cup. Everybody had reason to frolic and the Mess hall atmosphere was charged with excitement. Our routine almost slipped from my mind.

"The ground is still wet from today's rain. You guys still want to go for a walk?", said Ashish.

Pratham, who lives next door to me, joined in. "This kind of weather makes me sleepy, man! Lets skip the night trail today."

I had to hustle them for 15 mins and they finally relented. All the members of our club, around 12 in all, assembled outside the hostel gate. Torch in hand, we started towards a new path that we had spotted in the day.

The first half an hour passed normally. The rain had stopped in the afternoon, but the sky was still cloudy, with intermittent sparks of lightning. The cloud cover made it a moonless night, so we walked close together to avoid getting lost.

After some time, two people lost interest. One more guy had stomach trouble and had to drop out. These three turned back, and we moved on.

I could see that Pratham was highly tempted to join them! Nevertheless, he continued with us.

We kept moving, and headed towards the lake we had heard so much about. We stopped to admire a cluster of mushrooms. They were flourishing in the humid weather and constant rains.

We crossed two intermittent streams, formed due to the heavy rainfall. But there was no sign of the lake.

Ahead, we came to a fork in the road. One lead in the same direction, while one moved at a direction exactly perpendicular to our current path. We were perplexed.

I was of the opinion that we should change our route. "It's been forever guys. Obviously, we are going the wrong way!"

One of the other guys was contradictory. he thought we would lose our way. Finally, we split into two groups of Six and Three. Me, Pratham and Ashish were together. The smaller group would try the new path, and if we got lost, we would retrace our way back to this point and meet them ahead.

Saying this, we wished each other luck, and I led my brave comrades onto the new dirt track. As we progressed, we noticed that the jungle was getting more dense. The path was overgrown with grass, and stray branches kept slashing against our body. We could gauge that this route was not used often by people.

The route started sloping downwards and we had to tread carefully; the mud made us move slowly to avoid sliding into ditches along the pathway. These ditches which had tall hedges growing. The hedges were all in disarray; nobody had been maintaining them.

Suddenly I saw Ashish lose his footing, and slip. Pratham reached out to grab him, but Ashish fell through the hedges. Pratham turned around, his face apprehensive.

The hedge was lined with Pink Bougainvillea.....

Next

While living each day , taking the daily doses of life , there would be a few who would sit and comprehend the difference between growing and withering away. The charged up nerves , signalling at the slightest of motion , is given a standard name of a functional unit in our body. From the human anatomy to the cosmos , all stands the test of time and ignorance. For we are endowed with exemplary skills to materialize things without peering into their deeper meanings, forgetting what lies at the helm, the monarch , wisdom.

There can be interesting inferences , each one with ones own form of living , growing , learning and getting wiser. It could seem as easy as popping a pill or as painful as growing of 'wisdom teeth'. My stance would support the latter not because I'm fed with the contemporary saying , 'No pain, No gain' but because being wise and having 'wisdom' teeth is no child's play. It is a strenuous and willful exercise of learning as we grow or growing as we learn, where the difference lies in perception. It unfolds strenghts unknown , making this umpteen miles-walk luminous for a clearer vision. The added advantage is the way people start listening to you and your views and stop hearing them.

There are stories people might be living and making , but then every story comes with a moral we must imbibe. It's one conventional way of writing and comprehending stories. With each story , we grow some more. Stories needn't just be mine, I surely can borrow yours while I begin writing mine. Maybe, in the process we develop better a understanding and decipher finer meanings of life.

Some few days back I was passing through a house where I could hear a young boy shouting at his mother saying, "Aapko kuch samajh nahi aata, Ye aajkal ka trend hai, aap nahin samjhogi" and the poor lady trying to defend that she understands but she is just scared of him following a wrong track. I thought to write something for "Maa"; Hoping this boy to read and understand the "trend" of respecting parents. "Maa"...for herself she never asks..... sitting far all she does is prayers and far sitting alone all she does is fear that something shouldn't happen to her kid,forgetting all her pains,forgiving child for all his mistakes..one person that can never leave you alone,despite knowing you are wrong is "mother"...I feel its her prayers that follow us everywhere..mother is the one who will feel the pain when you in pain,its mother who will be the happiest to see you happy and successful,its mother who accepts you with all your faults,with all what you are in trueself, and with no star mark conditions....its she who protects you without asking for anything in return... maa will never complain and all she would do is take all the blames and keep child safe ...there are many relations but dis relation brings feeling of being complete and safe in the world where all are ready to pull you back...and I can say people who fail to value it are the true bunch of unfortunate people..

Today, I was standing outside my CAT centre, sweating like a pig. Not because it is too hot, but because I was about to sit for one of the most important exam of the MBA cycle. Every formula and every sum and passage that I had ever done or read was rushing through my head with the recurring fear of forgetting something important, of having slept just an extra hour during which I could have studied, of letting myself down, of the one mock which I did not give because of being lazy.

I sat down, right there on the pavement and was almost on the verge of crying. It became too overwhelming. I thought, "I'm not gonna get into a good b-school, which means a horrid placement, which means a mediocre life.

Suddenly, a heard someone saying behind me," All the Best." I looked back to see a middle-aged woman, whose own son had gone inside the centre and was also appearing for the exam. She had one of the most wondrous smiles and there was something so heart-warming about her face. " You'll do good. Don't worry and go inside." Those words were the last thing she told me before, literally, holding my hand and taking me to the gate of the exam centre.

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Now, that I sit here, on this laptop, in the known surroundings of my room, I realized that if it hadn't been for that woman, I would not have gone into the centre. I would have definitely gone home.

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I don't know who needs it or not, but I guess when there is so much riding on those 140 minutes, everybody needs a well-wisher and I can honestly say that there will be nothing more satisfying than wishing to all those tired, on-the-verge-of-shattering souls ALL THE BEST.

Because, Sometimes that is all that they need. :)

Here starts my story of failure,when i was in final year of my graduation.. gave cat 2011..i was confident about the results.and finally the most awaited day of my result came. i scored 89.98percentile with 89 percentile in section 1 and 92 percentile in section 2.even though expecting a call from iims is a paradox, still i expect atleast from iim kozhikode. but nobody called me. i didn't applied to anywhere else. i was totally off. because iam a commerce graduate, and i was working hard for my biggest dream of cracking cat. still i end up with a 89.xx percentile. i started feeling guilty about myself.my parents were happy because they thought she done it. but when i told them i will not get a call by this score , i saw a kind of despair on their face. but they didn't told anything . my mom told me to give cat one more time. this time i joined with a less reputed institue and start preparing. there were only 5 students including me. four of them was ready to join any institute which they will get, among them i started feeling a superiority . i stopped preparation. i used to touch cat materials only from class for those 1 and half hour. after 3 months i stopped going there.finally the D day of 2012 came. gave cat. i was not confident about my results. finally got a 65.xx percentile. still some blank faces in front of me. i felt shame about myself. didn't went out for 2 months. i was feeling shame to face others. there come my sister..she offered me one year cat coaching by her own expense.this time i joined a reputed institute . now doing preparation for cat.in between that i gave 5 bank exams . 3 rbi and 1 ibps and 1 federal bank. miserably failed in 3. now waiting the result of other 2.many times i heard that failure is the stepping stone of success. so one day it will be my day. iam confidently waiting for that day..

failure is the only opportunity to begin again....

'Google it out', is what we hear quite often if we are to find about something which is relatively unknown to us.Monsoon this time around was very kind on Mumbai ,but not the dengue and other viral fever which accompanies it.It happened that I had flu like symptoms which would come for an hour or so and vanish all of a sudden.This happened for a week or two and I was by no means serious about it.I dismissed it as a mere seasonal fever which usually occurs during the change of weather;but this continued for another week, now it got a bit serious for me accompanied by ulcers this time ,it was still kind of casual go around attitude by me,but something inside prompted me to search on Google; instead of getting myself examined by a physician.A Google search which would read 'fever from past two weeks and ulcers' and there to my horror all I could see was a big list of fatal diseases.Now this is where it all started and I started digging even more deep with every accompanying symptoms.It pushed me even more deeper examining carefully every symptoms of mine on Google,and my condition got even more worse.Now I was on a stage self convinced that I was stuck by a very fatal disease,and the very basis of this judgement was' Google search'.I was really scared to see a Doctor at that moment of time,my parents relatively unaware of my self diagnosed mental condition where forcing me to see a doctor from the day it started but I somehow would jerk of there suggestion.But eventually I had to give up and there was the day of my appointment,and every single microscopic question the doctor would ask would raise my heartbeat .The doctor asked me for a complete body check up and even asked to get a X-ray done.Now it got even worse for me, feared what I had already convinced myself of; that I was suffering from a chronic illness.every single moment from the time I had my test to the time my reports came on was horrifying to say the least.Then came the eventual D-timing,it was time to collect my report.Every step to the doctors place raised my pulse,but I somehow managed to gather courage to face the eventual.In came me in the doctors chamber with my heads down and pulse racing, The doctor opened it up for me;Looked at me and said 'eat well' everything else is fine with you,and all of a sudden it looked like a victory.A victory over my naivety to get myself self examined on Google.They say technology will eventually rule mankind,not really; if Google could make a good doctor we wouldn't need those 8-10 years of slogging done by a doctor.happy Diwali and no SELf examining please.:P

Continued from

"Are you OK, Ashish?"

"Ya I'm fine. Sandal's broken though......". He paused. "Dude! You gotta see this!"

I stepped through the Hedge, and came out of the Ditch. The scene on the other side was surreal.

A huge clearing. Barren, no grass. On the other side, I could see that the area was encircled by the Hedge and the Bougainvillea. But this was not all.

Smack in the middle of the clearing, was what looked an old Ashoka tree. There were no leaves on the tree, and it's silhouette looked entrancing, especially in the dark.

A chill ran down my spine. I instantly felt something was not right.

"Guys, this is the tree Shankar Anna was talking about. He didn't want us going near it."

Pratham was entranced by the tree. He started walking towards it.

"Pratham, don't !", Ashish warned.

"Now that we are here, it wouldn't hurt to look around! That tree looks really freaky!"

We reluctantly tailed him. I started to worry about the incoming rainstorm. The lightning had become frequent.

After about five minutes, when Pratham and Ashish had their fill of observing the tree and it's surroundings, I put my foot down. I had kept my distance from the tree, and was desperate to leave.

Pratham headed back to the hedge. I followed him, when I looked around for Ashish. He hadn't stopped looking at the tree.

I called out. He still didn't respond. I walked over to get his attention. When I reached him, I saw that he was blankly staring up at the branches. I tried to snap him out of it, but he kept staring upwards.

It was then that I followed his gaze. He was looking towards a spot between the trunk and branches. I couldn't see anything, but then there was a streak of lightning, which lit up the sky. I struggled to grasp what I was looking at.

I don't know what to call it. Let's say there was a creature, which was human at some point of time. It's limbs were thin and pale. The body was bony and frail,almost non-existent. It was hanging from a branch, and was staring down at us with it's face tilted towards the side. Long, white hair dangled from its head. It's eyes were hollow, like two pieces of coal.

But the face. I'll never forget the face. It had no cheeks, all it's teeth were exposed, in a sort of eerie..... entrancing.....smile.

Next

Previously

Bougainvillea

Bougainvillea - II

Bougainvillea - III

I tore my gaze away from the tree and ran towards Ashish. I dragged him by the neck to the hedge.As soon he lost sight of the tree, he snapped out of his trance .He looked petrified! Together, we three ran all the way back, and we stopped only when we saw our hostel.

Nobody spoke of what had happened.

Next day we saw Shankar Anna. When he heard our ordeal, he was not surprised. He told us of a time when the whole forest was infested with ghosts. When the land was sold to the college, a grand havan was organised and each tree was exorcised. This can be seen in the form of a Nail, embedded in each tree on campus. Only the tree in question, the Ashoka tree, was in grips of a powerful ghost and it was impossible to purge. So that tree was left in place, and the area was cordoned off with bougainvillea. "I have never had the courage to walk past that area, and now I know it was a good decision."

When we checked later, each tree did have a nail hammered into its trunk. Every tree on the campus.

After that, we curbed our nightly expeditions. Mainly because our narration of the experience shook everyone, and they were hesitant to venture out in the forest. Nevertheless, That experience scared the daylights out of me.

Sometimes, on a stormy night, lightning flashes bring back that image which has been burnt into my memory. The face, the tree, and the Bougainvillea.